kindertrauma

In Memoriam:: David Lynch

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Flags fly at half mass today at Kindertrauma Castle as we have lost one of the true greats, the incredible David Lynch. The world is a lesser place for sure and it’s easily said that there will never ever be any one like him again. We’re all luckily to have lived in the same time period as him and to enjoy the riches of watching him explore his singular vision over the years. He has left us with so many great works of art from paintings, to film and to extraordinary television. As a trauma-monger, let me say, nobody has ever scared me right down to the core like Lynch! Bob in TWIN PEAKS! Defoe (and Fenn) in WILD AT HEART! Blake in LOST HIGHWAY! Hopper in BLUE VELVET! That alley ghoul in MULHOLLAND DRIVE! Lynch really knew exactly the button to push in me to make me feel like I was in mortal danger and/or losing my mind. And then on top of that he was hilarious! So funny and so loved and so admired by seemingly everyone he collaborated with and supported. What an all around great guy and incredible artist and the epitome of never selling out and proof you don’t have to be a jerk to be successful. R.I.P KIng, and endless thanks for all your extraordinary work.

Unk's Year of Horror: 2024

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I won't beat around the bush, Coralie Fargeat’s THE SUBSTANCE was by far my favorite film of 2024 and that’s that. This colorful, sometimes humorous film put me through an emotional ringer and the gooey special effects laden conclusion rocked me in ways I haven’t been rocked in literal decades. Demi Moore delivers a career defining tour de force performance and deserves to be pelted with laurels wherever she goes forever. I’ve heard some say the messaging was a bit on the nose but I for one appreciate the clarity. Yes, the entertainment industry is especially cruel to woman in regards to unrealistic beauty standards but the horror of aging confronted in this film is universal if you hang around on this spinning ball of nonsense long enough. This crazy, sad, gorgeous, disgusting, vibrant film left my jaw on the floor where it belongs and I can’t shake its slimy paw hard enough.

Robert Egger’s NOSFERATU is so cheerless, morose, hopeless and depressing that I publicly accuse it of reading my diary. It’s also just absolutely stunning on a visual level and if you have any goth leanings whatsoever it’s gonna float your plague ship. A true work of art stuffed with unforgettable imagery, it also vibrates with what feels like an authentic occult power. This is a perfect match up of subject matter and director and I absolutely love how Eggers utilizes darkness to such incredible effect. All the performances are pitch perfect too; Bill Skarsgard as the titular monster somehow is able to mimic the terrible voice in my head I thought only known to me, Nicholas Hoult is steadily sympathetic and expresses terror perfectly, Aaron Taylor Johnson is fascinatingly broody, Ralph Ineson is his usual stalwart self and chisel cheeked Lily Rose Depp is a revelation in her ability to conjure supernatural hysteria. Most importantly, the cat survives and gets to live with the ever wonderful William DeFoe. This movie reeks of death so of course it left me smitten.

THE FIRST OMEN is so damn good and easily the surprise of the year (second only to my rekindled tolerance of Tim Burton). After the debacle that was THE EXORCIST: BELIEVER, I severely adjusted my expectations considering a modern franchise film being able to add anything of value to its source material (particularly in the case of Satanic seventies movies). Me of little faith! Dare I say THE FIRST OMEN is actually on par with the first classic film? Nell Tiger Free is phenomenal as a tortured would be nun reluctantly unravelling a Satanic conspiracy in seventies era Rome (especially when notably channeling Isabelle Adjani in 1981’s POSSESSION) and once again, the great Ralph Ineson is present to provide his signature awesomeness. Director Arkasha Stevenson delivers the perfect dour, paranoid tone and the scenes of horror push the envelope in surprising ways. Subtle where it needs to be, brazen where it aught to be, this sinister flick delivers a full stand alone experience that also beautifully enhances and compliments its demonic parent movie. Kudos and who’d of thought?

Sure ALIEN: ROMULUS sported the wonkiest CGI effect this side of 1999 (what were those translucent ghost teeth about? I see better deep fakes via Tik Tok on the daily) and the dialogue didn’t need to be so heavy handed on the fan service (pulling direct lines from previous films is just plain lazy) BUT, and this is a big BUT, Fede Alvarez brought back the OG’s sci-fi haunted house vibe, brought back the scares and the ick factor and he brought back characters that you really want to root for (BTW: I LOVE the ALIEN films, it’s really just compromising COVENANT that spurs my ire). I dig the world building here, I adore the level of tension and I greatly appreciate the multitude of creative set pieces. If you can just sneak by a couple of its flaws as if they were sleeping facehuggers, this is one of the most rip-roaring, adrenaline pumping thrill rides in the decades spanning series.

Osgood Perkin's LONGLEGS is a fever dream of unbridled weirdness and I may never fully understand its crazy mash up of serial killer thriller and uncanny supernatural horror but I heartily salute its high flying freak flag. The combination of subliminal, haunting, often nostalgic visuals and the stellar above par performances of BOTH Nicholas Cage and the underrated Alicia Witt (the nearly unrecognizable Maika Monroe and Kieran Shipka are no slouches either) made for an unforgettable deep dive into unnerving madness. Hail Satan!

Director Parker Finn impressively carved SMILE 2 into the perfect grimacing sequel. It’s bigger, bolder and more outrageous than its predecessor and beautifully expands its scope of terror. In a year of really incredible performances in horror (see titles above) triple threat Naomi Scott brings down the house as a multi-talented pop star with a drug problem exasperated by an infectious deadly curse. The film’s spectacular grande finale dispatches a demented smorgasbord of grotesqueries that are somehow equal parts toe-tapping and stomach turning. Bravo!

Girls, and especially vampire girls, just want to have fun and ABIGAIL may not be the type of movie that garners awards but it thankfully delivers a grande old, violent, bloody and sometimes giddy good time. There’s a party atmosphere going on here and the guests are a stacked cast of the genre’s finest (THE GUEST’s Dan Stevens, SCREAM V&VI’s Melissa Berra, Kevin Durand, who also killed it in this year’s KINGDOM OF THE PLANET OF THE APES, FREAKY’s Kathryn Newton, STOKER’s Mathew Goode, MAXXXINE’s Giancarlo Esposito) and Alisha Weir (who also excelled in MATILDA: THE MUSICAL) nails the deadly titular character. I agree that the movie would have been more fun if it was possible to see it without knowing its central twist but I had an absolute blast just the same.

Art the clown (virtuoso David Howard Thornton) has been hacking up the independent horror scene for some time but he really hits his stride and straddles the zeitgeist with TERRIFIER 3, a holiday horrorfest that truly lives up to its name. This feral, repulsive movie put me on edge by making it clear from its unrated, unruly start that it knew no bounds and couldn’t care less about playing by the rules. If you’re not a fan of cinematic violence or gore I’d probably stay clear but if you enjoy testing your mettle and feeling like a whimpering kid wondering how much you can withstand, this winking wild card is for you.

MAXXXINE disappointed seemingly many as a trilogy closing conclusion to Ti West and Mia Goth’s collaborative X and PEARL but I found it to be an enticing stroll on the shadowy, sleazy side of the drenched-in-neon block. I’ve got a soft spot for eighties flavored seedy exploitation flicks like ANGEL, VICE SQUAD and THE EXTERMINATOR, salacious and often scary scours of city night life that have become basically extinct thanks to the Disneyfication of our culture. For me, flaws and missed opportunities aside, this tale of an abrasive gal’s touring of the Boulevard of Broken dreams (while evading The Night Stalker no less) was an appreciated nostalgic treat that brought back fond memories of the joy of naughtily staying up late to watch forbidden fruit on late night cable or renting it on VHS.

A QUIET PLACE: DAY ONE scratched my disaster flick itch rigorously, warmed my creature feature loving heart and nicely ditched its nuclear family clan for more relatable and interesting (to me) square peg outsiders (Lupito Nyongo and Joseph Quinn, both excellent). It even features a lovable yet often anxiety stoking feline who clearly has more than nine lives to play with. Oh, if only the world would end on such a spectacular and less plodding note! Fingers (and beans) crossed!

FRESH VOICES: I thoroughly enjoyed spry squad IT’S WHATS INSIDE, CUCKOO and I SAW THE TV GLOW even though all three made me feel old as hell and maybe not so bright. IT’S WHATS INSIDE is an identity Rubik’s cube that I probably could have used a pad and paper to keep track of but once I got a handle on its language it turned into a challenging and ultimately satisfying CLUE-like old dark house mystery flick. The aptly titled CUCKOO dips Kubrickian chocolate into Cronenberg peanut butter and although I may never fully decipher its Orphan Annie on acid code ring, I dug its gorgeous setting, flashes of razor sharp horror and the incredible performances of Hunter Schafer and the impeccable Dan Stevens- that rare character actor with a leading man’s face. In my head I SAW THE TV GLOW leans more towards coming of age flick than horror (moon face dude and ice cream man are legit scary though) but its florescent visual poetry is stunning, its media addicted characters are relatable and its consistent disquiet vibe is genuinely entrancing.

THRILL ME, LUNATICS!: I got to the point last summer when I believed if I saw the trailer for SPEAK NO EVIL one more time, I too might lose my mind and go full blown postal. Still, James (yikes, EDEN LAKE) Watkins’ tight, taunt thriller about the dangers of keeping up appearances and not knowing when to cut your losses is a true nail biter and nobody but nobody does crazy like James McAvoy. Religion dissecting HERETIC leans toward the preachy itself and its second half doesn’t quite measure up to the first but the gift horse of an evil Hugh Grant should not be looked at in the mouth. NIGHT BITCH defies categorization yet this tale of a disgruntled house wife (an impressively fearless and award worthy Amy Adams) who is either going bonkers or transforming into a dog has enough body horror and borderline Lycanthropy in its kibble to certainly be considered horror adjacent. Surprisingly, for all its foaming at the mouth, it ends up being surprising poignant and inspirational in the (tail) end!

DECENT ENOUGH BUT NOT MY BAG: My Satanic seventies loving heart was really looking forward to LATE NIGHT WITH THE DEVIL but although I loved the set up and the always great David Dastmalchian’s superb performance, the somewhat silly fireworks climax and overall broad, cardboard aesthetic left this Faustian tale in the friend zone for me. I found ODDITY to be objectively atmospheric and spooky at times but thought the story was mundane and that the character’s behavior (and that too convenient trapdoor) were pretty unconvincing. On paper (and in my Trapper Keeper), the Kathryn Newton starring, Diablo Cody-penned, zombie teen romance LISA FRANKENSTEIN should have been right up my fluorescent eighties alley but it lost much of its steam when it killed off its best character (Carla Gugino’s step-monster) early on and the humor never really clicked for me (which is strange since I think Cody’s YOUNG ADULT (2011) is hysterical). I’ve seen these three flicks (especially the first two) on many a “Best of the Year” list so I’m assuming the problem is me and that’s fine. .

THE UNINTENTIONALLY HILARIOUS: No ill will intended but I found both M. Night Shyamalan’s TRAP and Lee Daniel’s THE DELIVERANCE to be so over the top loopy that they were unintentional laugh riots. They may not be well structured films but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t left, for better or worse, entertained. Josh Hartnett is phenomenal in TRAP regardless of the clunky material. He’s a real-deal charismatic movie star and TRAP is a solid reminder. Not so great is the preposterous, reality-defying script and anything to do with would-be pop star “Lady Raven” (Seleka Night, kindly taking some heat off of Sophia Coppola’s performance in THE GODFATHER III). Actors carry THE DELIVERANCE past the finish line too, with Glenn Close revealing sides of herself never imagined while receiving solid back up from the likes of Andre Day, Omar Epps and Mo'nique. Unfortunately, the film doesn’t commit to its possession premise till late in the game and when it does, it comes across as pure camp. Again, I’m not mad at either of these movies, they at least never bored me and they still crack me up.

NOPE, THAT AIN'T IT: Fans of THE STRANGERS & its groovy PREY AT NIGHT sequel deserved so much more than the halfhearted montage of nondescript forest stalking scenes the inconsistant Renny Harlin dumped to the curb (and so did the likable enough leads). TAROT wasted some very impressive creature design on a hoary tale with little bite. Slagging Blumhouse delivered an apparent flop trilogy with NIGHT SWIM, IMAGINARY and AFRAID. I only subjected myself to NIGHT SWIM (so far) and didn’t seem to hate it as much as others due to my chronic Wyatt Russell bias.

That’s about it. A pretty great year for horror with at least two future classics/debatable masterpieces (THE SUBSTANCE & NOSFERATU), rare sequels and prequels that actually delivered (THE FIRST OMEN, ALIEN: ROMULUS, SMILE 2, TERRIFIER 3), a few fun popcorn crowd pleasers (ABIGAIL, A QUIET PLACE: DAY ONE) and many a singular horror vision (LONGLEGS, TV GLOW, CUCKOO etc.). Now of course, I have not seen everything released in 2024 and nor do I want or plan to. All in all, I’d say the good outweighed the bad by a ton and that’s always reason to sloppily devour shrimp like Dennis Quaid and celebrate. Here’s hoping we have an equally awesome 2025! Pump it up!

Five More Underrated Ghost Movies (For X-mas)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

2011’s THE AWAKENING is a ghostly stunner that stars the ever reliable Rebecca Hall (also splended in 2020's NIGHT HOUSE) and was at least partially written by Stephen Volk the brains behind 1992’s essential made for TV mind-screw GHOST WATCH. The year is 1921 and hard nosed proto ghostbuster Florence Cathcart (Hall) is summoned to a boy’s boarding school thought to be haunted. An orphan herself, struggling with the memory of a fiancé who passed away, Cathcart gains a confidant and love interest in the injured and enigmatic Robert Mallory (Dominic West). The two eventually figure out that all of the ghostly activity can be summed up as the result of a child’s prank but just as she is preparing to pack up and go home everything in her world is turned on its head (and then some). This is a great looking movie with some very memorable visuals and more than a few outstanding performances. Anyone who enjoys a classic approach to haunting tales should seek it out ASAP (more HERE)

IN 2005’s FRAGILE, Calista Flockhart (I know we all want to forget ALLY McBEAL but she’s actually good in this) plays nurse Amy Nicholls who has recently started working the night shift at an unnervingly grim children's hospital that is in the midst of packing up and closing down. The children speak of a ghostly presence that lingers on the abandoned second floor named Charlotte who is creepily described as a "mechanical" girl. By all appearances this spirit seems to be raging against being left behind and has taken to smashing bones and throwing people out windows. Of course, nothing is as it seems, there is a mystery that must be solved and Amy must separate the hospital's woeful history from the guilty baggage she brought with her. Fragile goes to some seriously dank, dark and convincingly eerie, seriously scary places and like all the best ghost stories it has a tragic heart that plays with your sympathies as much as your fears. Directed by the hugely talented Jaume Balaquero who delivered the horrifying adaptation of Ramsey Campbell's THE NAMELESS, the flawed but atmospheric DARKNESS and the instant classic [REC] (Full review HERE).

2007’s WIND CHILL finds two young college students (Emily Blunt and Ashton Holmes who remain nameless throughout) who only vaguely know sharing a car ride to their respective homes for Christmas vacation. Strange behavior and paranoia eventually infest the journey and when the car crashes and the couple find themselves trapped in the middle of nowhere during a blinding storm, things get spooky. It’s admittedly refreshing to experience a ghostly tale that doesn’t utilize the old dark house setting and something about the idea of being lost and not being able to even clearly see a couple feet in front of you is genuinely unnerving. The resolution (or lack there of) may be too murky and undefined for some but I found the lack of definition sort of the whole eerie, dream-like point.

2016’s WE GO ON is from the same folks (Jesse Holland and Andy Mitton) who delivered the challenging YELLOWBRICKROAD (2010), It’s a wonderful ghost story that remarkably pushes the ancient art form into spaces I have never seen it occupy before. It's all about the pluses and minuses in believing in the great beyond and it pushes the idea that the further you step into the unknown the more you may find your safe seat of sanity dissolving in this plane. WE GO ON features the immensely talented Annette O'Toole (CAT PEOPLE) who deserves accolades and a half for her flawless work here. She's so darn good and she's in some fine company; Clark Freeman and Laura Heisler who were both in YELLOWBRICKROAD are welcome returners and as if we could dare ask for more, living legend character actor John (GREMLINS 2: THE NEW BATCH) Glover is on hand to steal a few scenes too. If you prefer the chilly, cerebral, slow boil side of the horror bed you should tuck yourself into WE GO ON if you can track it down. It has so much more to offer than scares, it's the type of horror movie that keeps you up at night trying to close the doors it opened in your head.

2011’s found footage horror film GRAVE ENCOUNTERS works as a clever parody of your typical paranormal ghost hunting show. There's a phony shit shoveling psychic and an amusing scene where the host pays off a gardener to lie through his teeth about his experiences. The "Grave Encounters" crew (who stand in dramatic, ready-for-action poses) are filming their sixth episode in an abandoned mental hospital that they find out is indeed seriously haunted. What ensues, though never fully believable, is so fun and gleefully spooky that you'll feel like a kid running through a neighborhood haunted-house on Halloween. You know it's not real, but you can't help getting into the frenetic spirit anyway. Not only are the shock scares surprisingly effective, but this movie also plays with your mind pretty good too. The asylum turns into a trippy maze of sorts and things get eerily surreal and the feeling of being trapped is palpable. The authentic setting, not unlike the one employed in SESSION 9 is an indisputably unnerving place but unlike many films of its ilk the cast is likable enough that your stay in this maddening place will be if not peasant, than at least tolerable (more HERE).

Five Underrated Ghost Movies (For Christmas)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I’ve always been envious of the British tradition of sharing ghost stories around Christmastime and lament that America never took up the custom as well. I guess that in the states ghostly happenings got regulated to the Halloween holiday so that Christmas could focus on truly frightening things like family dysfunction, rampant consumerism and celebrating Santa’s penchant for home break-ins and animal enslavement. The fact is (hey, I googled it) Christmas, much like Halloween has Celtic origins and both hinge on the belief that on specific days the veil between the living and the dead is especially flimsy. So why don’t we kick that snitching elf right off the shelf and focus on the chillier side of the holiday season? Here are five ghostly movies that you should check out if you haven’t…

1989’s aptly titled THE FORGOTTEN ONE is a haunter that somehow slipped through the cracks even though it boasts an impressive rock solid performance from horror royalty Terry (the 1987 classic THE STEPFATHER, 1988's hidden gem PIN) O’Quinn. Mourning his recently deceased wife, author Bob Anderson (O’Quinn) moves into a lovely Victorian house and slowly becomes dreadfully aware that the joint already has an inhabitant in the form of a voluptuous ghost (THE HOWLING's vixen Elisabeth Brooks) with an ample grudge. Skeptical love interest/neighbor Barbara (the always welcome Kristy McNichol of WHITE DOG ('82) and DREAM LOVER ('86)) tries her best to be supportive (ya gotta love a gal that helps you dispose of a corpse) but soon fears her potential beau has flipped his lid. Things get a bit convoluted in the climax thanks to time traveling doppelgängers and I certainly could have done without a superfluous depiction of a kitten’s death (c’mon, man! I'm trying to relax here! ) but the initial build up is surprisingly creepy (in fact, early encounters with the spirit are genuinely unnerving) and the three central performances are worth it alone.

In THE SKEPTIC (2009) Tim Daly (of the excellent Stephen King miniseries STORM OF THE CENTURY) plays Bryan Becket, the title skeptic who inherits a most impressive old house from an Aunt who has kicked the bucket. Bryan is a grounded, rational lawyer who is proud of the fact that he believes in nothing. You won't be surprised to learn that he ends up having to reevaluate his worldview when once in the house he experiences what appears to be ghostly phenomenon. An eccentric psychic named Cassie (Zoe Saldana of 2014’s ROSEMARY’S BABY remake) convinces Bryan to let her stay in the place too and together they learn that it's Bryan himself who is haunted by a dark past (Full review HERE).

Directed by Lewis Gilbert (who I’m indebted to for 1983’s EDUCATING RITA) and based on a book by James Herbert (who I’m indebted to for 1982’s DEADLY EYES and its army of dachshunds dressed as rats) 1995’s THE HAUNTED features Aidan Quinn ( shout out to 84's RECKLESS) as professor David Ash who lives to debunk the paranormal funk and is notorious for pointing out the strings that make phony baloney ghosties float. That is until one day when he is persuaded to travel to a palatial estate to prove the joint’s weird occurrences are likely more the result of a frantic nanny’s senility than anything otherworldly. There he meets pretty Christina (Kate Beckinsale of the UNDERWORLD franchise) who clearly has a thing for him and her two eccentric brothers (Anthony Andrews & Alex Lowe) who clearly don’t. We’re surely in familiar territory for most of the film’s runtime (that’s not necessarily a bad thing) but there’s a few tricks up this flick’s sleeve than one might guess. Its fiery conclusion, though no longer the shocking revelation it once was, is still a rug pull that lingers in the mind.

Hey, I was just talking about 2000’s spooker BELIEVE (over HERE) and now I am singing it’s praises once again. This meek yet affable PG rated adolescent ghost tale may not provide the most frightening scares but it’s well shot, well meaning and it consistently entertains. It’s sorta like Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys meet THE LADY IN WHITE (1988) and it features two of my favorite Canadians HOUSE OF WAX’s Elisha Cuthburt and the legendary Andrea Martin of BLACK CHRISTMAS (’74) fame.

1944’s CURSE OF THE CAT PEOPLE is well honored classic and hardly underrated but I’m going to include it here because I don’t see it mentioned enough when discussing supernatural Christmas films. Audiences expecting more of the same in this sequel to Jacques Tourneur’s psychosexual CAT PEOPLE (’42) were in for a bit of a surprise as rather than featuring feline transformations it centers on Amy (Ann Carter) the young daughter of the first film’s surviving couple (Kent Smith (also excellent in 46's THE SPIRAL STAIRCASE and Jane Randolph) who befriends the ghost of her father’s troubled first wife Irena (Simone Simon), much to her parents chagrin. The debut film directed by the great Robert Wise (who delivered arguably the greatest haunted house movie of all time, 1963’s THE HAUNTING), this thoughtful rumination on the plights and terrors of childhood is pure visual poetry. When poor Amy isn’t dealing with her less than supportive parents she must contend with a sinister spinster, a frightening old house, alienation from her classmates and even the headless horseman (more HERE)!

BONUS FLICK: All this ghost talk has gotten me pining for my yearly watch of 1982’s GHOST STORY which is based on what I would say is my favorite horror novel of all time of the same name by the late great Peter Straub. Now, this epic phantasmagorical book certainly would be much better served with a miniseries treatment but the existing film has got a great cast, gorgeous effects (thanks to legends Dick Smith providing jaw dropping make-up and Albert Whitlock delivering incredible matte paintings) and the overall bleak, chilling small town atmosphere is truly remarkable. A group of elderly men (the likes of Fred Astaire, Melvyn Douglas, Douglas Fairbanks Jr. and THE FOG ('80)’s grumpy John Houseman) who call themselves “The Chowder Society” gather together to frighten each other with terrifying tales of the supernatural but the scariest story of them all involves a secret from their own past that involves a beautiful woman named Alma (an off the charts ethereal Alice Krige) who just happens to be back from the dead to settle a long standing score. Put it in my veins (and haunt HERE for more)!

Name That Trauma:: Kevin M. on a Movie Theater Murder

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Hello there!

Maybe you can help me out with this one-I only remember this from an afternoon TV preview commercial for an upcoming horror movie they were going to be showing on TV and the part that sticks with me is a woman in a movie theater going to wake up her friend and discovering blood (I Think) and that her friend is dead and she starts to scream. I always had it in my head that it was "He Knows You're Alone" but now I'm not so sure.

Thanks for any help!

Kevin M.

Recently Viewed: Smile 2, The Pack, Oddity, Mr. Crocket, Heretic and Panic in Year Zero

Posted on By unkle lancifer

SMILE 2 (2024) is a confident slam dunk of a sequel written and directed by Parker Finn who skillfully expands upon the trippy paranoid universe he created in 2022’s SMILE and its precursor short film LAURA HASN’T SLEPT (2020). It’s a well crafted continuation that underlines and solidifies the power of the earlier entry while broadening its scope and still gifting the viewer with an entirely fresh and unexpected experience. Following the brutal demise of the previous films’ lone survivor SMILE 2’s mysterious crazy-making death curse attaches itself to a young celebrity pop star named Skye Riley (spunky triple threat Naomi Scott). Riley is a bit of a Lady Gaga wannabe who in pure moralistic cautionary tale fashion procures the demonic hot-potato grimace hex by attempting to purchase drugs (directly in opposition to her her current sobriety reliant comeback). Who can blame her though? Her dance routines are elaborate and she severely injured her spine in a drunken car accident that took the life of her famous actor boyfriend Paul Hudson (slyly cast Ray Nicholson, Jack Nicholson’s son who certainly has epic creepy smile etched into his DNA). Many compare the SMILE set-up to the invisible menace in IT FOLLOWS and it’s easy to see why but it also favors the FINAL DESTINATION franchise in its format, various BODY SNATCHER flicks in its overall anthropophobia and don’t mind me, I also get strong THE BOOGEY MAN (’80) vibes as well. That said, SMILE 2 kicks the insanity can further down the road than ever before with innovative maniac-mob dance hallucinations, teeth grinding gore, and a THE SUBSTANCE-esque late in the game monster reveal (not to mention it also features the ever reliable Rosemarie DeWitt playing Skye’s overbearingly concerned mom-ager). It’s a rare blessing to come across a sequel that perfectly compliments its previous installment without stepping on any toes and this worthy wonder is such a generous second helping it even provides its own toe-tapping banger-heavy dance-pop soundtrack.

Based on a novel by David Fischer, 1977’s treat-worthy THE PACK is a surprisingly suspenseful animal attack horror thriller helmed by Robert Clouse who is better known for the martial arts classic ENTER THE DRAGON (’75) and the unforgettable quirk bomb that is GYMKATA (’85). WALKING TALL (’73)’s lumbering Joe Don Baker is Jerry, a regular guy in the process of moving his boring family to isolated Seal Island (Actually, Bodega Bay California, the recognizable filming location for both THE BIRDS (’63) and THE FOG (’80)) not knowing that a bunch of despicable slobs have abandoned their pet dogs there and that said canines are so starved for Alpo they have assembled into a doggy mob who live in an abandoned barn and are not above hunting for human flesh when hangry. Even though this predicament could be easily fixed by I don’t know… FEEDING THE DOGS, Jerry and a rag tag crew of mostly unlikable local residents exasperate matters further at every turn and continuously stumble into the chomped up fates they so rightfully deserve. As you may have guessed I am team dog all the way and thoroughly enjoyed watching this furry horde chomp the humans clods into kibble. I also loved the mostly dark, rainy weather, the cozy barricaded homestead on display and was also very impressed with how the various dogs were presented with distinct personalities ranging from menacing to heroic to heartbreaking. Some of the animal in peril scenes got a bit iffy for yours truly but I’m going to take the Humane Society at their word that the film was heavily monitored and even assume that all the adorable good boys and girls involved had a great time filming it.

Damian McCarthy’s ODDITY is about a blind psychic shopkeeper (Gwilym Lee, excelling in a duel role) who specializes in cursed objects (a’la FRIDAY THE 13th: THE SERIES) who gifts a notably horrifying looking mannequin (think PIN (’89) meets THE FEAR (‘95) to her brother in law and his obvious mistress who are clearly responsible for her twin sisters death in some capacity. ODDITY has atmosphere to burn, a supremely potent supernatural vibe, haunting, alarming visuals, superior performances and a remarkable, innovative score. Sadly, the pedestrian story is basically the same plot as just about every episode of TALES FROM THE CRYPT and is less than convincing when dealing with basic human nature (what lunatic would even allow such a mannequin intheir home?). Overall it’s genuinely spooky but prepare to stifle your common sense for best results.

MR. CROCKET was a kid’s show in the nineties that was sort of like Mr. ROGERS meets BARNEY meets Bill Cosby’s PICTURE PAGES meets PEE WEE”S PLAYHOUSE but with a palatable for modern audiences heavy dollop of FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY’S and your standard faux-show creepy pasta mixed in. You know I’m all about the marriage of cute and creepy and Brandon Espy’s Hulu original (based on his short film of the same name) consistently delivers on an aesthetic level offering deliciously gory old school practical effects along with its cartoon-y death-furries, colorful off-kilter settings and amusing animated inserts. Mr. Crocket himself (as excellently portrayed by Elvis Nolasco) is a fun and Freddy-esque trickster demon who can bend reality at will and is laudably committed to avenging his own traumas and punishing those who basically line up and beg to die. On paper, I should be sitting snuggly right inside of Crocket’s nerdy nostalgia dipped pocket but I have to say something just doesn’t gel here. The overall movie suffers from the human characters being less dimensional than the puppets and never sufficiently anchoring things with a believable reality to contaminate and warp. It’s still offers an amusing enough time but somehow even with all the right ingredients baked in, there’s magic missing and its less than the sum of its intriguing parts.

In HERETIC, two young Mormon women (Sophie Thatcher & Chloe East) go door to door on a stormy day attempting to recruit new followers. Any guardian angels they might have are sleeping on the job when they hit the doorstep of Mr. Reed (Hugh Grant) who entices them indoors with half baked lies involving blueberry pie and a wife who is non-existent. What follows is a philosophical battle of wits that involves religion, board games and pop music plagiarism and culminates in the revelation that the faithful ladies are trapped with a madman with a spiritual axe to grind. Scott Beck and Bryan Woods’ limited setting psychological thriller's strongest selling point is the above par acting of its three leads. Grant has grown more credible in his curmudgeon-fueled later years and both Thatcher and East are worthy and charismatic sparring partners. There are more than a few unexpected twists and turns to this thoughtful Rubik’s cube of a film but viewer’s enjoyment will surely hinge on their tolerance for the talky subject matter that can be at times fascinating and at other times tedious. This is more of a rainy Sunday afternoon creeper than a rousing nail biter and I’m not sure I even buy its premise (both missionaries seem way too bright to even get into this mess in the first place) but in my book, the performances alone keep things consistently interesting.

The late great Ray Milland (Oscar winner for THE LOST WEEKEND (’45) and hilariously brilliant in personal favorite THE ATTIC (’80)) directs and stars in 1962's PANIC IN YEAR ZERO, a super ahead of its time apocalyptic road movie. Milland is Harry Baldwin a suburban everyman who takes his family (which includes wife Ann (THE ASPHALT JUNGLE’s Jean Hagen), daughter Karen (SPIDER BABY’s Mary Mitchel) and a young Frankie Avalon (GREASE) as son Rick on a fishing trip in their small camper. The trip gets off to a stinky start when they witness worrisome bright flashes and then a much more worrisome mushroom cloud over Los Angeles thanks to somebody dropping an atomic bomb. Traffic is too clogged to go back and save granny (sorry!) so the clan figures it’s best to continue to their cabin in the wilderness destination where they might observe the end of civilization from a distance. As you can imagine, the Baldwins journey is is filled with many a hardship including still more lamentable traffic, untimely price gouging on gas, roving rapist hooligans and the ever present threat of radiation sickness. Not a great fishing trip at all but at least they brought a suddenly very useful rifle! This movie is dark, gritty and has little faith in humanity and suits my pessimistic nature just fine. My only regret is that I wasn’t lucky enough to catch it on late night TV as a kid because it definitely would have been a go-to favorite for me over the years.