2019’s READY OR NOT is a blend of kill or be killed motifs lifted from THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME dunked in seventies era occult paranoia and TOM & JERRY level violent slapstick. The jewel in its crowd-pleasing crown is a fierce performance by Samara Weaving portraying a betrayed woman on her wedding day forced to fight for her life against a horde of lunatic in-laws. Having ended on the most satisfying note possible (lone survivor Grace (Weaving) smoking the most deserved cigarette since Veronica (Winona Ryder) Sawyer’s at the climax of HEATHERS (’88)), it wasn’t exactly begging for a rinse and repeat sequel but fortunately, its continuation READY OR NOT 2: HERE I COME (which starts exactly where the previous flick left off) ups the ante on all counts, adds a few more vibrantly threatening and/or hilarious characters and may even be the finer outing at the end of the day. I’m not exactly loving the fact that now, seven years later, the idea of rich elites hunting humans to sacrifice to a demon in exchange for power has somehow become less fantastical and more likely than before, but here we are. For me, the most important factor in a survival/revenge movie is its comeuppance quota and there’s no question that RON2:HIC delivers on that front.

As prescribed by HALLOWEEN II (not to mention COLD PREY 2), it’s off to the hospital for unsinkable, blood-soaked heroine Grace where she meets up with estranged sister Faith (FREAKY’s Kathryn Newton) who she neglected to delete from her emergency contact information. Insults, accusations and recounting flashbacks collide as the two siblings catch each other up to speed. The family reunion is short lived when a would be assassin (rightful heir to Christopher Waken’s hand-me downs Kevin (CLOWN IN A CORNFIELD, ABIGAIL) Durand shows up to sever any loose ends hanging from Grace’s unprecedented survival of a worldwide Satanic Cult ritual. Please don’t make me explain the knotty intricacies, rules and technicalities involved in the curse-sport depicted, just know that it allows awesome people to participate like horror legend David Cronenberg as a psychotic patriarch who sired kids the likes of Sarah Michelle Gellar (BUFFY, SCREAM 2, IKWYDLS) and THE FACULTY’s Shawn Hatosy. Heck, this Horror hootananny even secured such guests as MANIAC (2012)’s Elijah Wood and BATES (still miss this show) MOTEL’s Nester Carbonell! Not sure if it’s ethical for the casting director to read my diary, but I’m not complaining. Seeing all these fine folks butting heads on the big screen is like watching CLUE (’85), a star studded disaster film (think POSEIDON ADVENTURE or THE TOWERING INFERNO), and an episode of FANTASY ISLAND (which if I’m not wrong, played the DANGEROUS GAME card on multiple occasions) all at once. Ya can’t beat that.

READY OR NOT 2 is as much riotous fun as the snappy jaunt it spawned from but I’d say much more adept at exploring the benefits and deep pitfalls of family ties. Gellar is a standout as an ice queen who’ll stomp on anyone to retain power and Hatosy is uncomfortably scary as her sadistic, sociopath brother. Weaving and Newton make a great pair especially when handcuffed together a’la THE DEFIANT ONES or cracking skulls to the tune of Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart” (which is becoming a go-to horror staple after previous needle drops in URBAN LEGEND (’98) & overachiever THE STRANGERS: PREY AT NIGHT (2028). Considering the wedding ballroom location and the sisterhood angle, I would have gone with Sister Sledge’s “We are Family” but nobody asked me).

Poor THEY WILL KILL YOU! It’s a fantastic movie but somebody really messed up allowing it to be released so soon after RON2! Even if one could get past the fact both flicks are about surviving the night against a Satanic cult while kicking around themes involving exploitive class divides, the emotional heart of each film revolves around estranged sisters, the younger of whom resents being abandoned. It’s like the same banger song sung two wildly different ways. Both are equally worthy, but it’s gotta be disheartening being the second horse out of the gate, especially when the enthusiasm for the first horse wasn’t exactly off the charts. TWKY needn’t sweat it though, time will be kind and it won’t be much of a shock if this artsy, action packed also ran becomes a cult favorite somewhere down the line. My psychic prediction is that Director Kirill Sokolov will make a highly regarded masterpiece in the future and then folks will scramble around looking to check out his gutsy earlier work.

This is a gorgeous movie with rich dark, earthy hues that resemble a Goya painting and the sound design and use of edgy innovative music is phenomenal. We’re talking SUSPIRIA (’77) level eye-candy partnered with KILL BILL-esque over the top fighting sequences. It’s got a dark, gloomy occultist vibe akin to Alex de la Iglesia’s THE DAY OF THE BEAST (’95) and is generous with the gore in a way that recalls Peter Jackson’s BRAIN DEAD (’92). The SUSPIRIA nods continue as NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3: THE DREAM WARRIOR’s Patricia Arquette plays a queen bee marm who sorta channels Joan Bennett’s Madame Blanc and oversees an ancient Manhattan high rise secretly operating as a Satanic temple of sorts (shades of 2004’s TOOLBOX MURDERS). She’s even got a creepy kid sidekick (yet another note shared by RON2)! It’s all good stuff and I trust it will be properly appreciated one day. Twin movies are nothing new (looking at you VOLCANO & DANTE’S PEAK (both '97), not to mention DEEP IMPACT & ARMAGEDDON (both '98) et. al.) so rather than lament this duo’s accidental yet indisputable similarities (Oh, now I’m thinking of FRIDAY THE 13th (’80) & THE BURNING (’81) and my beloved hell party doppelgängers HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME (’81) and MADHOUSE (’81) ), I’ll just rejoice that they’d make an excellent double feature (preferably at a drive-in).

I was on the fence about seeing UNDERTONE because even though critics seemed to be digging it for the most part, I was noticing it was divisive among horror fans in a very familiar way. This seems to happen a lot with small scale, intimate flicks that rely on viewers imagination/participation more than anything else. My track record with such movies is pretty spotty and unpredictable. I find THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT terrifying to this day while some people find it boring (I blame my deep fear of being lost- I have nightmares involving that predicament all the time). Some folks were terrified of PARANORMAL ACTIVITY but I never got that movie at all and sorta resented feeling jerked around by it ( I partially blame my strong aversion to the characters who seemed to be begging for trouble). I coerced a friend to drive me miles to go see SKINAMARINK and I’ll never hear the end of it even though I absolutely related to the childhood fears it stoked (though I also think it would be better suited to an art installation rather than a movie theater). (Semi) recently I was quietly chilled by Steven Soderbergh’s PRESENCE only to find many found it completely confounding. Seems like you just can’t predict how one of these deliberately ambiguous movies will hit you and who knows how much mood, life experience and current willingness to empathize effect the end results.

But then then the movie stopped and the harshest of lights went on in my theater as an emergency siren began to wail and a new voice boomed demanding that I go to the nearest exit as soon as possible! This has happened to me at least five times in my life beginning with a 1988 showing of MIRACLE MILE and always at the worst possible time! My go-to movie joint is in a mall and seems to be extra susceptible to this kind of disturbance. I should be used to this type of thing but with the world the way it is, I don’t feel like messing around with what could be an active shooter or let’s say, a nuclear warhead. So I high tailed it and came back later for a free voucher which I was begrudgingly given (apparently it was a short lived interruption and they started the movie back up exactly where they left off but sadly I happened to be in a “feet don’t fail me now” state of mind). Now, usually I would not dare write about a movie that I did not see in its entirety because the last ten minutes could conceivably make or break a film but in this case, I feel reasonably safe to recommend it on account of both roving reporter Mickster AND trusted Kindertrauma contributor Small Dark Cloud assuring me that having seen the full movie, they both give it two thumbs (or maybe ears in this case) up! The Honorable thing for me to do is use my voucher to indeed catch the last ten minutes of UNDERTONE as agreed but nope, I’m going to use it to see READY OR NOT 2: HERE I COME instead cuz I’m cheap and I can’t wait to see Sara Michelle Gellar on the big screen again (if this negatively effects READY OR NOT 2’s box office take , I am truly sorry). Perhaps after RON2 I will attempt to sneak in and catch UNDERTONE’s finale at last. One thing is for sure, I can’t stop thinking about it and that’s always a good thing.

Does the highly successful SCREAM 7 deserve the pummeling it received from critics? Nah, not at all. It’s got a spooky, surprisingly mature melancholy vibe going for it, one of the best kills in the franchise (clearly inspired by the classic 1981 slasher MY BLOODY VALENTINE), one of the stronger opening set pieces and juggles themes concerning trust, the paranoia of parenthood, the threat of AI, post-trauma survival and toxic parasocial relationships fairly well (especially considering that its director, Kevin Williamson, is responsible for the cinematic detention known as TEACHING MRS TINGLE). It’s understandable that some folks might be reluctant to support the film on account of its lamentable behind the scenes drama (in a nutshell: Production company Spyglass Entertainment fired proposed returning actress Mellissa Barrera for speaking her mind, lost co-star Jenna Ortega and the creatives known as Radio Silence due to their solidarity with her, and caused a complete upheaval of the planned trilogy story arc). Personally though, I’m far too invested in the long running SCREAM franchise to consider a boycott. It takes many, many folks to make a movie so my attendance is officially in support of the film career of newbie horror icon McKenna (ANNABELLE COMES HOME) Grace and frankly, I need to know what my boo Gale Weathers is up to (It helps that avoiding unpleasant reality is a specialty of mine). Anyway, it turns out that all the negative energy surrounding the flick kept my expectations duly in check and as much as I enjoyed recent SCREAMs 5 & 6, I ended up digging 7 even more. It’s got an eerie, quieter tone (similar to my faves the OG & Part 4 ) and I didn’t miss the sometimes overly flashy and chaotic (too lively for gramps) beat of the previous two entries.

Venerable “celebrity victim” Sidney Prescott (properly paid her worth, Neve Campbell) is back and seemingly following in the luckless (yet pleasingly autumnal) footsteps of final squirrel Laurie Strode (preparing for the inevitable a’ la 2018's HALLOWEEN and pissing off her overprotected child a’ la ’98’s H2O… sans the problem drinking, self sabotage and questionable hair). Like many successful authors, she’s gone and opened a coffee shop (?) in a small town to raise her daughter Tatum (a surprisingly engaging Isabel May) hopefully in a murderer-free environment. Tatum seems a bit too tall to be Sid’s kid until you learn her cop-pop Mark Evans is played by longshanks Joel McHale ( I easily accept Joel as a police officer thanks to 2014’s DELIVER US FROM EVIL). Unsurprisingly, suburban harmony is short lived when one of Tatum’s besties Hannah (aforementioned horror royalty McKenna Grace) is heartlessly slaughtered while rehearsing for a high school production of Peter Pan (in which Tatum plays the dog). Who is responsible for this SCOOBY DOO calamity? Stalwarts Gale Weathers (Queen Courtney Cox with a killer entrance) and sidekick Meeks-Martin sibs Mindy & Chad ( Jasmin Savoy Brown & Mason Gooding) provide back-up in the search for multiple red herrings and iffy clues. Happily for me, no wheels are attempted to be reinvented and the entire cast is much more likable than usual, Sidney especially. Gone are Sid’s hemming and hawing quirky mannerisms and instead what stands before us is a take no crap momma bear we can all be proud of. She’s straight forward, direct and focused on others besides herself. I think this my favorite iteration of her and that’s saying a lot.

Maybe I’m just half glass full rationalizing, but did things somehow (no thanks to the powers that be) work out for the best? At least in the fictional SCREAM universe? By sitting out the last installment (due to a warranted salary dispute) Neve/Sidney developed a strong, returning champion status and solidifies further audience loyalty and appreciation. By not returning here the Carpenter sisters Sam and Tara ( Barrera & Ortega) avoid bummer fates (Tara was set to die, Sam was to become a killer bent on revenge) and provide some much needed space to focus on the Heckle and Heckle comedic stylings of the suddenly much more endearing Meeks-Martin twins Chad & Mindy (Mason Gooding and Jasmin Savoy Brown). If things had gone as planned, I’m not sure we would have gotten a glimpse into what I think may be the present heart of the series, the the reluctant yet powerful friendship and comradery between Sidney and Gale. At one point Sid describes their relationship as “complicated but enduring” and I found that strangely affecting (not sure if credit goes to Williamson or reliable Guy (FINAL DESTINATION: BLOODLINES, ABIGAIL, READY OR NOT) Busick). Missed too probably would be Sid clarifying to her daughter that she named her after her BRAVE friend Tatum not her “victim” friend Tatum which I also found fortifying. Surely not all will agree, but as a lifelong slasher fan and SCREAM enthusiast since day one, I was very pleased with how 7 luckily hurdled every messy obstacle thrown its way. If I have one complaint, it’s only that Kirby Reed (Hayden Panettiere) wasn’t squeezed into the winning proceedings. Oh well, there’s always part 8 for that.

Consider this an addendum to the (semi) recent post looking back at the horror films of 2025 (HERE)! There are still a few I need to track down but at least I’ve done my due diligence. Special thanks go to my local free library for filling in the gaps created by a multiple of slapdash streaming services!

I’m very glad that knowledgeable reader DekesYellowBikini suggested I check out Drew Hancock’s COMPANION, it certainly deserves to be mentioned among the best of the year. Boy, was I mislead by the awkward advertising for this fun flick, the trailer somehow gave away both too much AND too little! To be fair, the movie does mesh genres and changes its colors and tone like a hard to define drugged up slippery chameleon but I would have at least liked to have known how darn funny it is at times. In any case, it’s certainly not the cold, affected scold-y flick I wrongfully assumed it was. COMPANION is hilarious, horror laced, and action packed and truly thought provoking (especially for someone who rooted for the replicants in BLADE RUNNER). It also features an impressively game cast of horror alumni which includes Jack Quaid (SCREAM, 2022), Harvey Guillen (WEREWOLVES WITHIN & the much missed TV series WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS, Lukas Gage ( SMILE 2), Megan Siri (IT LIVES INSIDE ) and the truly commanding Sophie Thatcher (HERETIC, 2023’s THE BOOGEYMAN). It’s loads of fun and super expedient if you’re looking to get your sci-fi, horror, action and dark comedy itch scratched in one bright and gripping fell swoop.

BONE LAKE concerns two attractive couples who find they’ve both booked a lakeside manor for a weekend getaway and (foolishly) decide to shrug their shoulders and share the joint. Seems like an easy fix except one of the couples is clearly cray, highly deceitful and super sleazy on multiple levels. This is a taunt, highly engaging psychological thriller that satisfies but doesn’t leave much of a dent due to its garden variety set-up (I mean, we already got two versions of SPEAK NO EVIL clogging up the pantry) and hardly revolutionary revelations. As a die hard fan of nineties era “Blank From Hell” flicks, I highly enjoyed the time I spent at BONE LAKE but I have a strong feeling that I won’t remember having viewed it a month from now. It’s sorta like that FRUIT STRIPE gum that cartoon zebra used to peddle; it hits the spot but has very little staying power (note: It’s possible I watched this too soon after the more flashy COMPANION which might have dulled its effect).

DANGEROUS ANIMALS has got my name written all over it because I love Australian horror, adore sharks and dig the ever-loving weirdness of Jai Courtney on account of he reminds me of the late, great (and perhaps certifiably insane) Oliver Reed. Although Courtney usually comes across as a ticking time bomb I don’t think I’ve had the privilege of witnessing him portray a truly unhinged psychotic before. He does not disappoint. Here he plays a barrel chested serial killer named Tucker with the decidedly frowned upon hobby of taking folks out on his boat, feeding them to sharks and amassing a large collection of VHS recordings of the killing (Seeing VHS tapes on a boat gives me anxiety because it seems like the perfect breeding ground for mold). One day he makes the grave mistake of abducting a feisty young woman named Zephyr (tough as nails Hassie Harrison) who has gotten the sticky end of the lollipop one to many times in life and ain’t having any of it. For the most part, DANGEROUS ANIMALS is pretty much WOLF CREEK, AHOY! and I’m afraid it has a really rough looking CGI climax (& not enough sharks) but its definitely worth checking out for the performances and for the fact that Zephyr could be one of the all time toughest, strongest, most formidable and resilient horror heroines.

In my humble opinion, 1984’s cult classic THE TOXIC AVENGER does not seem like the type of movie that should be remade. I’d assume it would be a recipe for clunky, out of touch, disaster to try to duplicate something so inherently campy, charmingly cobbled together and adorably tasteless. Well, I guess for the millionth time I’ve learned that I should have more faith in the universe because writer/ director Macon (I DON”T FEEL AT HOME IN THIS WORLD) Blair’s flavorful, properly-punk, gooey fluorescent spin is its own fine beast and does my passed away feline “Toxic” who was named after THE TOXIC AVENGER ('84) proud. Peter Dinklage is Winston Gooze, a put upon employee of a pharmaceutical company who embarrasses his son Wade (Jacob Tremblay) with his mild mannered fecklessness. Winston eventually discovers that his boss Bob Garbinger (ubiquitous legend Kevin Bacon) is beyond corrupt and has an equally sinister bro named Fritz who sorta resembles Batman’s nemesis The Penguin (the always welcome Elijah Wood). In an attempt to silence Winston, Fritz’s gang “The Killer Nutz” throw him into a vat of radioactive waste that transforms him into the monstrous yet lovable superhero we all know and adore and we are treated to a molten stew of thrills, hilarity, slapstick gore and a surprising touching tale of acceptance between father and son. I couldn’t have been more wrong about this movie so as Prince once said to Sheena Easton, “I stand corrected”.

Emilie Bilchfeldt’s THE UGLY STEPSISTER is a gruesome retelling of the Cinderella story from the viewpoint of one of the stepsisters. It is incredibly beautiful and incredibly ugly at the same time like an ornate decadent pink pastry filled with squirming worms. Theoretically unattractive Elvira (objectively lovely Lea Myren) has a dream of marrying a certain poetic prince but like many a dream, it is actually a soul shredding Hubert Selby Jr. designed nuclear warhead waiting to explode in her face. Pushed by her manipulative, abusive mother (Ane Dahl Torp), the foolhardy young woman attempts to better herself with increasingly painful and emotionally devastating results. Typically, a small glimmer of hope appears and it seems her efforts will be rewarded but alas, the light at the end of the tunnel is a freight train transporting rotting garbage. This is a glorious looking film with an incredible score that utilizes the body horror sub-genre to explore self harm, body dysmorphia and the corrosive nature of atrocious parenting. I’m so glad I watched this incredible work of art but I’m also banishing it to the “never view again” pile on account of it kicking me in the emotional shins over and over again. It’s a clever, stunning, harrowing journey that does not let up for a second and I’m mostly just going to try to forget it. But I can’t. Because of the tape worm. I can’t forget the tape worm (sobs).

I feel like I saw 28 YEARS LATER: THE BONE TEMPLE a million years ago in another dimension because I viewed it before the 2026 snow-pocalypse and the general collapse of society. Those were the days…two weeks ago! From what I recall through the hazy mist of seasonal depression, BONE TEMPLE picks up right after the divisive tone-stomping conclusion of 28 YEARS LATER with spunky survivor Spike (Alfie Williams) being recruited into a CLOCKWORK ORANGE by way of TELETUBBIES gang of blond wig wearing miscreants lead by bonkers Jimmy Saville wannabe/Satanist Sir Lord Jimmy Crystal (creep master Jack O’Connell). Spike proves his mettle by offing a fellow member but really isn’t enthusiastic about the gang’s penchant for torturing and killing innocent people on the daily. He’s clearly looking to scrape the lot of them off his shoe as soon as possible and finds an unexpected ally in a punky gal known as Jimmy Ink & later, Kelly (portrayed by talented standout Erin kellyman).

Meanwhile, at the titular bone temple, Dr Ian Kelson (a never better Ralph Fiennes) is building a tentative friendship with the infected behemoth known as Sampson (Chi Lewis-Perry). Like many a successful relationship, they connect by getting as high as possible while listening to Duran Duran in a clothing optional setting. This is actually more touching than it sounds, especially when Samson recalls his last moments before infection (aboard the dilapidated train featured in the previous movie) and through drug therapy, is able to speak a single word once again, “moon” (giving off some nice "Bub" from DAY OF THE DEAD (’85) vibes). Of course, Spike and the doctor’s paths eventually cross again (after an incredible show stopping dance number featuring the doc & IRON MAIDEN) and the aftermath is worse for some characters than others.

Alex Garland’s script is intriguing as you’d expect and Nia (CANDYMAN (2021)) DaCosta’s direction is a seamless fit for the material. It goes without saying that the DURAN DURAN peppered soundtrack hit yours truly in the feels (is there a more poignant song than “Ordinary World” in existence?). Most critics and audiences who went to the theater to see BONE TEMPLE gave it the high praise it deserves but unfortunately the confusing marketing, poor release timing and varied responses to the previous installment's semi-flippant closure resulted in a poor showing at the box office (even a couple folks in my sphere wondered why I was seeing the same film twice). Hopefully, we’ll get the next chapter anyway as the film closes with a stunning cliff-hanger that deserves to be fully explored ASAP.

Just as I was casually preparing a noose for myself like Blair (Wilford Brimley) in THE THING ('82) out of the frozen abyss a ray of startling, warming light broke through the ice in the form of a new film from the venerable Sam Raimi entitled SEND HELP. Somehow I’d missed any and all advertising for the film but who needs persuasion when the offering in question has Raimi at the helm and furthermore features the absolute dynamo Racheal McAdams? SEND HELP is an apt title for this gem because it is the answer to my every silent prayer for cinematic mental aid. It completely obliterated my own personal reality for its entire runtime just as a fine chum of a movie should. This fantastic flick had my best interests at heart and I think it even shoveled my driveway.

Rascally Canadian treasure Racheal McAdams plays Linda Liddle a frumpy, sad sack tuna salad enthusiast who is abused at work and lives in a shoebox apartment with her trusty animal familiar (think Michelle Pfeiffer’s Selina Kyle in BATMAN RETURNS (’92) or Kathleen ’s Turner’s Joan Wilder in ROMANCING THE STONE (’84)). Dylan (LOVE & MONSTERS (2020)) O’Neil is her smug, callous, nepo baby boss Bradley Preston who enjoys golf and exploiting underlings (Think Dabney Coleman’s Franklin Hart, Jr. in 9-5 (’80) but way younger and without a the killer ‘stache). The two are on an airplane with a bunch of not long for this world workplace stooges when things go awry (in a gloriously Raimi fashion) resulting in put upon Liddle and dippy despot Preston being stranded on a seemingly deserted island.

Turns out SURVIVOR superfan Liddle is remarkably capable and resourceful and soft handed Preston is a useless lump of whinery. In the absence of society’s guardrails, roles are reversed, heads butt and dark screwball comedy, serious thrills, splinters of horror and vague romantic tensions ensue (think the Tom & Jerry battles of the sexes violence of WAR OF THE ROSES (’89) meets the TALES FROM THE CRYPT moral commentary of DEATH BECOMES HER (’92) meets the satisfying workplace comeuppance of WORKING GIRL (’88) meets the rollicking adventure of THE LOST CITY (2022) meets the basic, nearly sitcom level set-up of the forgotten Amanda Bynes vehicle LOVE WRECKED (2005)- how’s that for a deep cut?). This delightfully bonkers spinning wheel of genres never once misses a beat while delivering both a hilarious good time and layered messaging on gender, power dynamics and social class. McAdams is phenomenal as is O’neil, and their chemistry together is pure riotous fireworks. A gruesome and gore happy as it sometimes gets, it perpetually blasts bright colorful fizziness that harks back to the colorful less dour and gloomy hits of the eighties. What can I say, Sam Raimi not only still has it, but arguably may have hit a career high and that’s really saying something. Thanks, Sam and company, I needed that (P.S. keep your eyes out for a clever Bruce Campbell cameo)!