It's a killer bee movie (not b movie!) – I've recently seen The Deadly Swarm and Killer Bees to no avail. My trauma is the death of a little black girl who is innocently playing a kazoo or horn -and the Queen was inside it which then attracted the swarm. The girl is stung to death. Anybody know??
Month: May 2013
Name That Trauma:: Reader L.J. on a Rocky Clown Kitchen
I had to have been like 2 or 3 b/c my sisters hadn't been born yet so it must have been around 1980 or so- my parents took me (WHY??) to the drive-in with them, and all I remember of the movie were clowns, horrible, terrible, clowns, I think one (at least) had a knife, and a scene in a kitchen with the doors getting all blocked up with rocks, lots and lots of rocks- I think the entire kitchen ended up being filled with the rocks, but my parents kept trying to make me lay down in the back seat so I couldn't watch, also it's been over 30 years, so I'm a wee bit fuzzy on it all. If you can identify this craziness for me, I'd be full of gratitude.
Traumafession:: Reader Cara H. on Star Trek's "The Lights of Zetar"
I was born in 1965, and actually did not see Star Trek for the first time until I was ten years old and it was in reruns. One would never think of Star Trek as a scary show, and this episode has been panned by most critics. But it scared the crap out of me. The garbled speech made by the victims of the Zetars is probably a source of amusement for most, but to me it was the stuff of nightmares. My brother knew this and would try to imitate it to get a rise out of me. As well, like Dr. McCoy, I found the scene where they teleported into darkness on Memory Alpha unnerving.
I've always found the idea of having one's mind taken over frightening. I was raised Catholic, so the concept of demon possession was very real to me. However, although I can't watch The Exorcist alone in darkness, I could still watch it alone with the lights on. I can't watch "The Lights of Zetar" alone at all, and I'm now almost fifty years old!
I think what makes "The Lights of Zetar" so intensely terrifying, even as opposed to the concept of demon possession, is that they destroy the ability of the victim's brain to function at all. Once the demon vacates the host, the brain is still intact. Not so with the Lights of Zetar. They blow out every circuit. Their attack is comparable with a deadly stroke or seizure, something that none of us wants to think about. You can't hide behind a strong door or shield and you can't run away in your ship. If they want you, they'll get you.
It's a funny thing: I saw Alien with my father (rest in peace) when I was fourteen years old, and even though sometimes if I enter a dark room I swear I can see those things in the shadows, nothing has scared me quite as much as one unpopular episode of a 1960's TV show which generally was anything but scary.
Name That Trauma:: Reader Jeff T. on a Mouthy Hot Tub Lady Monster
Hello!
I was hoping somebody could name this one. As a child, an irresponsible adult I knew sometimes let me watch horror films. The ones I remember best are The Thing, Prom Night 2 (I think), and a third film that I simply cannot track down. The only scene I recall from this movie involved the main antagonist, a sexy lady monster, in a hot tub making out with a curly-haired guy. A monster hunter is after her, apparently, and she knows it. So at the, ahem, moment of truth, she morphs into a hideous monster with lots of mouths all over her body (that's what my five-year-old self interpreted them as, anyway…) and kills the guy. The monster hunter shows up and finds the guy's corpse in a hot tub full of blood. This would have been mid- or late-80s. It definitely wasn't Species, although there are more than a few similarities.
Thanks for the help!
-Jeff T.
Sunday Viewing:: Blood Rage (1987) Happy Mother's Day!
Happy Mother's Day! Let's watch BLOOD RAGE! I know this movie takes place on Thanksgiving but that doesn't mean it's not a swell Mother's Day movie too! I'd say BLOOD RAGE (aka NIGHTMARE AT SHADOW WOODS) is a better Mother's Day movie than MOTHER"S DAY but then again, what isn't? LOUISE LASSER plays Maddie, a caring mother of two twins. One of the twins is a crazy psycho and one of them is not. One Thanksgiving the nutty twin escapes from the funny farm and blood-soaked, identity mix-up hijinks ensue. BLOOD RAGE has got to be one of the funniest slasher movies I have ever seen. It just kills me. The music is out of control, there's a ridiculous attempt at exposition using a psychiatrist's voice-over narration, the violence is slapstick hilarious and the incredible LASSER is constantly forced to fill in the gaps in the script with lunatic ad-libbing! Frankly, it's non-stop awesome. The strange thing is I don't think MARK SOPER who plays twins Todd & Terry is half bad! He kinda reminds me of ALEX McARTHUR in RAMPAGE (1987)! If you really love your mother, you will force her to watch this with you and if you really love yourself, you'll invite your evil twin along too!
The Incubus (1982) He is the Destroyer!
Once upon a time, one of my favorite video stores was closing and selling off its stock and so I went to feed upon its carcass like a slobbering vulture. I had a limited amount of funds and so many a Sophie-esque choice was made that day, one of which would come to haunt me in shameful, near psychotic ways. My haul was to be complete after one final DVD decision. I could either get AND NOW THE SCREAMING STARTS (1973) or THE INCUBUS (1982). I had not seen the former and I owned the latter on VHS and so in the spirit of open mindedness and expanding my horizons, I left doe-eyed THE INCUBUS behind. What kind of a person does that? A fool.
As it turned out I had severely underestimated my love for THE INCUBUS and richly overestimated my giving a crap about AND NOW THE SCREAMING STARTS! In order to rectify the situation, I jumped over to Amazon to rescue my mistake only to find it out of print with its price tag soaring by the minute! To buy it at three or five times the amount that I had recently snubbed my nose at was impossible! I was an idiot and suddenly my life was incomplete. There was a hole in my heart that went all the way to China and that howling abyss could only be filled by one thing. It was as if I had lost a leg in a war and was now cursed with a phantom ghost leg except for the war and the leg part. (Please note that while all of this nonsense is going on there are actual real tragedies taking place all over the world.)
What was wrong with me? By my calculations this behavior was the exact opposite of Zen. I was acting like one of those horrible record troll people who hang off of cardboard boxes at garage sales with crazed looks in their eyes prepared to strangle anyone who gets in the way of their precious Gollum prize! I had to snap out it. I had to stop checking Amazon every week with the sole purpose of torturing myself! Why was my sense of well being tied to something so trivial and why did I feel like I had somehow betrayed a part of my youth? I'm not what I own and yet I can't help thinking nobody deserves to have this DVD more than me! I might have just stopped the madness and bought it at any price but you know…you just know… as soon as I did that it would become available again and I'd be a chump again.
I had to get off the merry go round and so I gave up. The dust settled, the cuckoo went back in the clock… and soon, as predicted, THE INCUBUS was rereleased on DVD! See miracles really do happen when you set your sights low and happen to be the pettiest person on Earth! I even waited (the hubris!) for a used copy and got it super cheap! Victory was finally mine! It came in the mail and I welcomed it with open arms and I was contented for exactly one second! Hooray for me.
I really do like THE INCUBUS more than I lead on in THIS review. Now that we've been through the ringer together our relationship has grown even stronger. It's got some hammy acting, at least one instance of truly horrendous dialogue (I don't want tenderness!) and a less than stellar script (based upon a book that probably shouldn't have been adapted in the first place) but Lord love a duck, the general vibe of it sings my wretched song. How are you are not going to love this perfect bubble of time when the eighties were becoming the eighties but were not all bright and wacky yet? Is there anything better than a movie that wants to be a slasher and a gothed-out supernatural tale at the same time? I want to be both those things too!
I know some folks find this movie super sleazy on account of all of the wall-to-wall demon rape going on. I guess it is but it's all presented as so grim and depressing that it's hard for me to see it as exploitive. Personally, I'm more interested in the oppressive wall of monstrous sexual angst I believe it shares with the same year's AMITYVILLE 2: THE POSSESSION and THE BEAST WITHIN. Seriously, what is it with that year? Where the planets aligned in some specific way? Anyway, in my book, director JOHN HOUGH is criminally underappreciated. He's done great stuff (TWINS OF EVIL, LEGEND OF HELL HOUSE, the excellent AMERICAN GOTHIC), some noteworthy stuff (WATCHER IN THE WOODS, the WITCH MOUTAIN movies) and even a lovable stinker (HOWLING 4: THE ORIGINAL NIGHTMARE). Really, what DVD collection is complete without all of his movies? Oh no.
Mother's Day Funhouse
"I'm so proud of my boys- they found all ten differences!"
Name That Trauma:: Reader Luke on Strange Happenings in the Snow
I have a very vague memory of a movie I saw as a kid. I must have watched it in the '90s but it could have been a movie from the '70s to '90s. I don't remember which part happened when but I'll try my best. I didn't watch the whole movie either, just a few scenes. It was about this woman and her son in a winter setting and it was like no matter where they went, something totally bizarre and scary was happening. They went to a middle school or high school and all the kids looked either possessed or demonic or like ghosts. They wanted to hurt the woman and her son but they ran. Then she is driving and to her right she sees a guy standing in the snow and he suddenly falls through. I think she investigates this and finds a facility underground and there are a bunch of people fighting this machine/alien; not really sure what. Like I said, very bizarre but I would love to find out what it is called and watch it as an adult.
— Luke
Sunday View:: Next of Kin (1982)
Let's give Netflix Streaming the cold shoulder today on account of how it put us through the emotional wringer last week and forced me to eschew my much needed beauty sleep! Let's go visit our unreliable and fickle old pal YouTube instead! I usually don't feel entirely comfortable wrapping a post around a YouTube movie as you never know when they too will skip out on you, but today's flick is so good it has inspired me to throw caution to the wind. I also sometimes worry that if I get folks to watch something for free (!) then somebody somewhere, a bag lady perhaps, is not getting her royalty check! Karma-lamity! The thing is this one isn't on DVD anyway and my theory is if you watch it on YouTube now, you'll be happy to buy it if it ever does become available and then save that hypothetical bag lady! You can't save her if you don't know the movie exists! Yes, I'm only pretending to care!
Anyway, today's fantastic flick is called NEXT OF KIN! If you've already seen it you know what I'm talking about and if you haven't, get ready for your next favorite thing in the world. Just listen to these incredible stats! It's from Australia, it's a lady vs. awesome house tale, it's from 1982 the magical year for perfect movies, the cinematography is outstanding, it has one of the best horror scores of literally all time (Viva KLAUS SCHULZE!) and the strapping love interest is the psycho from WOLF CREEK (thumbs up JOHN JARRATT!)!!! I would not be terribly surprised if NEXT OF KIN was an influence on TI WEST's HOUSE OF THE DEVIL. It's got the same lazy stroll pace and then just when you are all warm and snuggly, it crashes your cranium with an iron frying pan. Although, allow me to say, I think NEXT OF KIN carries the superior clobber! It's a lightening bolt! It's a veritable goth-gasm! Nobody deserves to be as happy as it's sure to make you! I'll let you in on a secret. I've watched this movie a couple times now and I'm still unclear about why folks want to kill this lady. I'm not sure it matters. Now, think of a movie in your head! NEXT OF KIN is better than that movie!!! It's my favorite type of thing except this time it's actually done well! It's proof positive that there is gold in them there hills just waiting to be unearthed! Watch it now!!!! Or don't!
The Devil's Rain Funhouse
Heaven help you find the ten differences in these two posters!