Author: aunt john

Hi Guys. It's been too long. Had to drop by after spending my morning chasing down old anti-drug PSAs. I was disappointed with DARREN ARONOFSKY's new ones for the Meth Project – too sleek for my taste, perhaps – which made me nostalgic for some of the ads from my past that *really* traumatized me.

There's one I can't seem to find, probably from the late '90s or early 2000s, that I could never sit through after the first time (which unfortunately was late at night, wrapped in a blanket on the sofa in the dark). I always assumed it was made by Partnership for a Drug-Free America, but after researching their ad history, I'm beginning to doubt it.

In the ad, a glamorous woman, heavily made up and possibly in a long evening gown, seats herself before a lighted vanity mirror. She starts taking off normal things, like her makeup, maybe some fake eyelashes… though even that is very striking in the unflattering light. You begin to dread what is coming next, and then, affirming your worst fears, she removes her wig, revealing no or very thin hair, and finally, yes, false teeth. I'm assuming these were the effects of meth, but I'm not certain. I have no recollection of what the ad sounded like, in terms of music, effects, or voiceover.

And while I'm at it, I'll mention another commercial – this one not drug-related, but obviously still employing a scare tactic – that I've also been unable to find. Up until recently I was positive it was for Liberty Mutual Life Insurance, but now I'm doubting my memory. A teddy bear is falling from the top of a tall building in slow motion, while a child's voice sings some type of chant or nursery rhyme. The camera is looking up from directly underneath. The teddy bear gets closer and closer to the lens as it falls, and finally there is an impact that seems to crack the camera lens. The suggestion is clearly of a child's death.

Man, that was a depressing contribution. Sorry! Advertising execs are sick! If you guys can assist with either or both of those, I'd be obliged.

Much Love,

OnlyChild1213

Great site! Found it while looking for info on a movie that scared the crap out of me when I was a kid. (Just finished watching DARK NIGHT OF THE SCARECROW for the first time in 30 years and now want to watch this other one if I can find it.)

I saw it on television — can't remember if broadcast or cable — between 1977 and the summer of 1983. The basic premise is that some object is passing close to the Earth and is making people do crazy things. There was a scene in which people go crazy and attack each other in a grocery store, and another in which a guy puts a shotgun in his mouth and pulls the trigger for no reason.

I'm positive it isn't NIGHT OF THE COMET, but I just can't remember what the hell it is called. Hoping somebody remembers this old one.

Thanks,

— TonyB

UPDATE: NAME THAT TRAUMA SOLVED! Special thanks to kinderpal David Fullam for naming it with STARSHIP INVASIONS.

OK, so I am trying to help my friend solve his trauma. These are all the details I have:

He saw it in the mid-to-late '90s but that doesn't mean that is when it was made. No help there I guess.

There were kids involved, under some sort of mind control/body snatching. At one point there are football jocks, and one throws a football that turns into some sort of weapon by way of some TERMINATOR 2 looking silver liquid. The weapon then kills someone.

We know for sure that it isn't THE FACULTY or DISTURBING BEHAVIOR. Any idea what it could be?

— Cara

UPDATE: NAME THAT TRAUMA SOLVED! Kudos to reader Ben Sher for naming it with PROM NIGHT III: THE LAST KISS!

THANK you for your help with my recent trauma!

Are you game for another challenge?

I'm not sure how your website works – if I'm allowed ONE per year or whatever.

BUT, if you're game to help with some more, the following are THREE – COUNT 'EM – THREE TRAUMAS for the price of one, though two of them are for sure short films, and one I don't even know WHAT the heck it is.

TRAUMA #!:

This was a short film that ran on NICKELODEON during its earliest days. I remember being so upset by this film that I would actually change the channel and run around the house finding things to do when I wanted to watch TV and it was on, waiting for it to end. It was a short animated film about a boy or girl, can't remember which, trying to get through a scary night. There were two sequences in particular that bothered me.

One was a very long sequence in which the kid's bed would bounce up and down with increasingly angry breathing sounds coming from something beneath it, like a loud inhalation and exhalation of breath that would grow in intensity until the kid's bed was flying up to near the ceiling and dropping back down with every breath. This goes on for a long time and then the kid V-E-R-Y slowly gets off the bed and looks under his bed, and after a long long long sequence of silence and angry-faced shadowy bat-creature SCREAMS up across the screen out from under the bed.

The other part features a sequence of dialogue that I remember almost word for word. It showed a pendulum with a blade on it coming out of the kid's ceiling and swinging lower and lower with every beat of the following poem being spoken by the narrator: "The dividing line 'tween real and dream is like a razor's edge so KEEN!" and on the word "keen" the pendulum is about to hit the kid in the head/body and then the pendulum disappears with a "pew pew pew" sound effect.

This is followed by a softer-spoken line as morning comes and the kid's made it through the night where the narrator says "… to be dissolved by warm sun-rays that broke the spell."

I may have the words slightly wrong, but anyone who can track this down would shock and surprise me.

TRAUMA #2:

This was another short film that would air on NICKELODEON from time to time featuring a man who was running around a house being chased by an evil creature that looked as though it was made up of PILED-UP AUDIO TAPE! The monster's movements were in stop-motion. Whenever the monster itself moved, it was accompanied on the audio track by a very slowed-down voice speaking like a monstrous sound "Rrrrr SHhhhhRRRh hHHHRRRHHRHHRHRHRHHHHHH!"

The man would sometimes hide behind doors, and the monster would poke little bits of the tape through the bottom of the door. When these little tendrils of tape would appear, there would be accompanying high-pitched super-fast speaking on the audio of the short film.

At one point, I remember the man uses a magnet he finds to fight the monster, and it works to stop it temporarily from grabbing him. Eventually, though, the man gets eaten by the monster and the tape wraps all over his body and leaves behind his clothes. Then, the monster goes over and uses its little tape tendrils to type something on a manual typewriter, which I never understood from not having seen the beginning of the short but which seemed like it was some kind of invitation to someone else to come visit the house where the tape monster lived, the context suggesting the monster was sending out letters to friends of each victim to lure more people to the house to be eaten.

TRAUMA #3:

This was a film that I THINK was black-and-white, seen on T.V. in the afternoon on a Sunday in the early-to-mid '70s. I don't remember much of the details, so this one will be a challenge I think.

All I remember was that it featured a scene of a big house near a cliff face, with waves crashing on the cliff face. I also seem to remember someone finding bits of rock/stone/charcoal or something like that in their sink, and being upset by it, like it was crystallized water or something. My memory wants to say there was a bit of narration at the beginning where a voice or text was saying something like how modern society has never faced many of the great threats from the past but as we continue to explore our world we will encounter more of these forgotten terrors, or SOMETHING hyperbolic like that.

The upshot of it all was that the charcoal substance, if you touched it, it turned YOU into the same charcoal substance. I think someone got turned entirely into it, or it turned all the water inside of them into the same charcoal substance. It is not THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN (that was a whole other trauma).

— Becca V.

AUNT JOHN SEZ: The answer to the second one is the 1975 short RECORDED LIVE. As for numbers one and three, I am not too sure. Can someone please help Becca out in the comments?

I was hoping maybe you could help me with a movie title. I have been looking for it forever. I remember watching it on T.V. late at night when I was younger. This was in the late '80s early '90s. I remember toward the beginning of the movie there is a teen-aged girl and she somehow got trapped in a house. She is looking out the window of the room and sees a guy get hit in the head with a shovel or a mailbox. She falls back from the window and lands on the floor. After sitting there she lifts up her hand and there are a few maggots on her palm, she brushes them away quickly.

I could be getting it confused with another movie but I thought at the end she somehow finds her way out of the house but it's like shes crawls out of a drain or something and there is this crazy looking lake or something. She may have been helped by a troll?

Any help would be greatly appreciated!!!!

— Buffy

UNK SEZ: Hmmmm, the guy getting hit with a mailbox doesn't exactly fit but the rest sounds like it could be DARIO ARGENTO's 1985 flick PHENOMENA (although if you caught it on T.V. it was more likely titled CREEPERS). The girl (JENNIFER CONNELLY) being trapped in a house, finding maggots in her palm, escaping through a drain and ending up at a lake all fit. There is even a mutant kid who looks like a troll- although he was not so much trying to help the girl as kill her. Check out the clip below (It's the Italian version) and let me know if it rings any bells!

I have a memory of one of the episodes of RIPLEY'S BELIEVE IT OR NOT with JACK PALANCE. I was very young and my whole family was watching it at my grandmother's. In this episode I have a vague memory of one of the stories of people being burnt in a fire, and a very old house was haunted. Someone in the same episode had knowledge of where one of the otherworldly inhabitants put a key down a well; the key was discovered later by a crew digging up the well. If this makes any sense to anyone and they can find the episode, I would appreciate it.

Dearest Kindertraumatics,

I saw a film as a kid and the only scene I remember is that there was a group of people at a house and seems like they had been warned to stay out of a certain room. One of them went into it and ended up walking in circles, staring up at the light bulb, in a trance. That's all I remember and it's been bothering me for 25 years. I know it's not much to go on but if anyone would know it'll be you guys.

Thanks,

— Brad

UNK SEZ: Brad H, I think (hope) I've got this covered! This sounds like one of my favorites and it's a bit of a kindertrauma for me too even though I saw it when I was much older. I'm thinking it must be the segment from SCREAMS OF A WINTER NIGHT entitled "The Green Light". In it a bunch of frat guys dare each other to stay in an old abandoned house and end up eerily hypnotized and swarming under a green light bulb like crazed moths. Read my review HERE and check out the clip(s) below!

When I was about 7 years old, I was watching T.V. and I thought the movie was about a leprechaun who wanted the family's gold. But I was so scared I kept changing the channel back and forth. It's definitely not one of the LEPRECHAUN movies. For all I know this could have been two separate things, but it's been bugging me for years.

There was a scene where a girl lays down on her bed and goes to reach for her teddy bear and it bursts open and maggots come out. I'm not the only one who remembers something similar. Might have seen the same thing, but I'm not sure that it is from GOOSEBUMPS. I'm guessing late '90s or earlier.

Thank you!

— Kelly G.

Okay… So I can't remember a lot about this movie, but I saw it on T.V. when I was about 7-9 years old and the puppet in it scared the hell out of me. It wasn't even a horror movie, it was a family film!

The puppet looks like some sort of cat/dog or mammal in a cartoony style. I don't recall ever seeing his legs, but they could possibly have been shown. (Most likely without his top half in the shot.)

He has the ability to appear random places and pop out of anywhere like cupboards, trash cans, lockers etc… just general holes/crevices/places the camera can't see into fully, so it gives the illusion that he disappears into some weird Narnia place like all the good creepy monster puppets.

The puppet is a good guy and helps this kid for some reason, or maybe the kid is helping him? …I just remember, he wasn't the bad guy/villain in the movie.

So the kid in this movie plays baseball or some type of sport because I remember a scene in which he was in the changing rooms in his uniform talking to the creepy puppet that had popped out of a dirty laundry basket or something.

There is another part I remember… The villains/bad guys in the movie that want to capture the puppet for some reason unknown, are in a magic shop or some place that happened to have an ancient scroll depicting the puppet in ancient Egypt, canoeing down the river Nile with the pyramids in the background.

This is all I remember of the movie, I hope somebody can help me! Thanks in advance!

— James L.

UPDATE: NAME THAT TRAUMA SOLVED! Special thanks to reader Matthew Hurwitz for naming it with MUNCHIE.