kindertrauma

Author: unkle lancifer

6 Films to Keep You Awake

Posted on By unkle lancifer


If you remain unmoved by the recent airings of the diluted MASTERS OF HORROR series entitled FEAR ITSELF, 6 FILMS TO KEEP YOU AWAKE, the Spanish language equivalent, may be just what the mad doctor ordered. All the tales hold something of interest and happily the lion's share boast themes of a truly Kindertraumatic nature. On a technical level, 6 FILMS consistently impresses by constantly delivering a too rare, rich theatrical vibe to the small screen. A bit of patience may be required with the more subtle and psychological of the stories, but all in all this half dozen set of variant views of the dark side provides the chills.


BLAME
Doctor Ana Torres does the old bait and switch on pal Gloria when she offers her and her young daughter room and board in exchange for Gloria's aid at her in-home medical practice. Gloria soon learns that not only is Ana carrying a torch for her, but that she also wants her to assist in providing secret abortions to boot. When Gloria herself becomes pregnant, Ana coaxes her into taking advantage of the house specialty with high anxiety and profound regret the result. The aborted fetus disappears, young daughter Vicky begins carting around a tin box and slimy residue is found on the attic stairs. Directed by NARCISCO IBANEZ SERRADOR (the classic WHO CAN KILL A CHILD?), BLAME throws the viewer off by pointing its finger in every conceivable direction until its final thought provoking, slightly frustrating scene.


SPECTRE
An older man looks back on his youth and the part he played in the ostracism and tragic death of his first real love. This is a true blue ghost story in the PETER STRAUB vein, filled with some startling imagery and capped with an ending that grows creepier the more you think about it. Haunting in every sense of the word, SPECTRE director MATEO GIL (NOBODY KNOWS ANYBODY) proves the best way to slip a noose over the audience's head is very quietly.


A REAL FRIEND
Think you're tired of the old kid has make believe friends that just might be real storyline? What if I told you the kid's make believe friend was THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE's Leatherface? This fascinating journey into the mind of a little girl who just may have seen one to many horror movies is a must see for genre fans. The less I give away about this superbly crafted, beautifully shot mind screw the better, but I'll leave you with this, Leatherface is not the only icon who drops by…


A CHRISTMAS TALE
I'm a sucker for X-mas horror, but I was taken aback by just how up my alley this segment turned out to be. I was pretty much sold from the beginning, which not only spoofs a cheesy zombie flick but also introduces us to a group of kids who appear to be the missing members of THE GOONIES. Making things all that much more irresistible is that the action takes place in 1985 and we're surrounded by references to such things as THE A-TEAM, THE KARATE KID, the miniseries "V", Princess Leia, and that blinking light game SIMON. The kids discover an escaped female convict trapped inside a hole in the woods and rather than aid her decide to exploit the situation to their advantage. When the crazed Santa costumed woman does finally make her way out of the hole, well, to quote one of the kids, "She's got an axe and she's pissed!" Amongst holiday horror flicks this is highly original and lots of fun. You can bet I'll be watching it again once December comes around.


THE BABY'S ROOM
ALEX DE LA IGLESIA (DAY OF THE BEAST) is an exceptionally talented director and this particular tale showcases his strong suites well. This is a haunted house tale and like all good haunted house tales, the structure in question is really just a substitute for the interiors of the human mind. IGLESIA is able to inject potent doses of humor without diluting the terror as he peels back the wallpaper to reveal something akin to real madness. JAVIER GUTIERREZ and LENOR WATLING both turn in highly memorable performances as a couple whose new home subjects them (and their infant child) to domestic anguish levels not seen since STANLEY KUBRICK's THE SHINING, another must see.


TO LET
One director I cannot get enough of is JAUME BALAGUERO ([REC]) and here he does not disappoint. MACARENA GOMEZ and ADRIA COLLADO are a young couple checking out an apartment listing who get unsnarled in a nightmarish trap of which there seems no escape. GOMEZ, who you may remember from DAGON, has a striking resemblance to horror icon BARBARA STEELE and frankly she's impossible to take your eyes off of. Her performance along with that of NURIA GONZALEZ as the authentically frightening captor is something to behold. BALAGUERO's wonderful visuals are a given, but here he really showcases his deft hand at creating edge of your seat suspense.


If you've enjoyed recent Spanish language horror films like [REC], THE ORPHANAGE and PAN'S LABYRINTH this set is for you. I enjoyed all six of these productions and that's a real rarity. Less gimmicky and more in touch with a real genuine sense of the uncanny than most popular horror, they actually may have the power to keep the viewer up late into the wee hours.

NOTE: There's much more Kindertrauma fun to be found HERE!

Traumafessions :: Mr. Canacorn (and Absinthe) on Dot & the Kangaroo

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I was going through my Netflix this evening and up popped DOT AND THE KANGAROO…immediately I got a jolt up my spine and my palms started sweating.  How could just seeing the box cover of this innocent sounding animated musical cause me so much strife?  Well, it all started back in the early ‘80s on cable television…

Some youngsters claim it was the monstrous Bunyip from DOT that gave them nightmares…but not me.  I've always loved monsters.  For me it was the Aboriginal tribe that Dot and her kangaroo pal spy on.

The way I remember it, the tribe was performing a hunting ceremony around a fire.  One tribesman was draped in a kangaroo skin and dancing around while the hunters advanced on him with boomerangs and spears.  The didgeridoo was droning on and on and the hunting dogs were howling at the moon….the hunters raised their weapons and the tribesman/kangaroo was actually sacrificed as Dot and her kangaroo watched in horror!   There was blood and screaming and a dying man draped in a freaking kangaroo hide thrashing around…it was horrible!  Then Dot and the kangaroo were attacked by the hunting dogs…Dear Christ, make it stop!  I watched the last bit of the movie huddled in the couch cushions too scared to look back at the screen until the next musical number.

How could this happen in a movie with singing koalas and platypuses?  Wasn't ritualistic murder too much for children to handle?! *

That was it…I never watched DOT again.  And get this, every time I hear a freakin' didgeridoo I think of that hollow eyed kangaroo skin wrapped around a bloody and broken Aborigine…creepy stuff.  I hate the didgeridoo…and Dot…and her stupid kangaroo.

*Apparently it was.  After typing my traumafession I hopped on over to YouTube to find the horrible scene that has haunted me for over 20 years (you can find it at the end of part 9 and beginning of part 10)…there's no murder…but I could have sworn…

UNK SEZ: Take heart Mr. Canacorn, you are not the only one blindsided by the misleadingly child-friendly DOT, this came from our pal Absinthe of GLOOMY SUNDAY fame, who apparently DID find issue with the Bunyips you mentioned…

"It was one of the Dot movies – I still haven't determined which one it was – they were Australian kids movies featuring animation and live action. I'm thinking it was either DOT AND THE KANGAROO or DOT AND THE KOALA but the scene that got me was there was some kind of Australian evil spirit in a cave. And I'm pretty fuzzy about the details but I know it really got me when I was younger and supposedly watching "safe" TV. This one was once again, endless nightmares and thinking the evil little aboriginal thingys were coming to get me…"

Now Absinthe, you may want to sit down (and bolt your window and doors) before you watch this next clip from DOT AND THE KANGAROO…

The Awesome Mr. Canacorn can be found at AWESOMENESS FOR AWESOME'S SAKE and the lovely Absinthe haunts GLOOMY SUNDAY.

Nightwing

Posted on By unkle lancifer

nightwing

Made and released at nearly the same time as '79s THE PROPHECY, the killer bat movie NIGHTWING shares many similarities with our favorite mutant bear flick. Riding the tail end of the nature-bites-back wave goaded by JAWS, both PROPHECY and NIGHTWING were directed by established directors, wore their long-winded environmental messages on their sleeves and questionably recruited up and coming swarthy Italian actors to represent the plight of the American Indian (ARMAND ASSANTE and NICK MANCUSO respectively).

NIGHTWING probably still holds the title as the best killer bat movie ever made, but that doesn't change the fact that it's fatally dry and about three times more talky then it needs to be. (Take it from me, I own the seriously uncompelling Fotonovel). The cast couldn't be better, MANCUSO is the sh*T, THE ISLAND's DAVID WARNER makes a far better scientist than a pirate, and have I mentioned my long standing adoration of KATHRYN (THE SENDER) HARROLD? The cinematography and the musical score by HENRI MANCINI are top notch as well, but there's no way around the fact that most of the flick is about as stagnant as a stalactite.

There is one scene that gives you a taste of what the film might have been and frankly it's almost too awesome to describe. Right smack in the middle of the film, surrounded by all that ponderous dialogue is NIGHTWING's crown jewel, a campfire attack to end all campfire attacks. The special effects may be a tad crappy by today's standards, but the set-up and surprisingly sadistic tone more than make up for it. Watching co-eds meet the business end of gardening equipment may be fun, but you have not lived until you have observed stuffy, prissy middle-agers running about pell-mell with bats chomping on them from head to foot. What's remarkably hilarious is just how cowardly the male campers are (keep an eye peeled for CHARLES HALLAHAN whose head will later sprout spider legs in J.C's THE THING), they leave one woman to fall into the actual fire pit and catch aflame, and the other one is refused access to the safety of a nearby van. When the poor woman seeks refuge under the vehicle, her husband nonchalantly drives over her head!

Two more scenes of this caliber of questionable taste and overall pandemonium would have made NIGHTWING an instant classic but alas, some people insist on taking the high road and it is we the audience who suffer. NIGHTWING (and the beloved PROPHECY to some extent) is a good example of trying to woo respectability at the cost of forgetting just who butters your bread. Let me tell ya' future monster movie makers, that Oscar is never going to be yours; do yourself (and your actual audience) a favor and spread on the blood.

indelible scenes

  • It may take place on a super fake soundstage but the campfire attack is gleefully brutal
  • Director HILLER squeezes some genuine suspence from the electrified cage scene
  • Sighting of seventies staple STROTHER MARTIN (SSSSSS)
  • Duran (MANCUSO) is visited by his dead grandfather who claims responsibility for the bats being summoned. Is this a hallucination or our these bats supernatural in origin?
  • Working against the clock our heroes venture into the bat's cave … be careful of the deadly ammonia pit!

    • nightwing

    Official Traumatizer :: Tim Curry

    Posted on By unkle lancifer

    Tim Curry

    I've said it before and I'll say it again, Kindertrauma readers know their horror. Reader sbd gave me a major head-slapping, "I could have had a V-8," moment when he remarked that Mr. TIM CURRY should be considered an official Traumatizer. CURRY not only perfectly embodied perhaps the scariest and most kinder-traumatizing television entity of all time as Pennywise the clown in the miniseries IT, but he also pretty much made a career out of playing people who you would not want to be left alone in a room with. (I'm well aware that there are many out there who would be delighted at just such a scenario, but this is neither the time or the place!) CURRY's portrayals of the demonic Lord of Darkness in LEGEND, the BERNADETTE PETERS withstanding opportunist flimflammer Rooster Hannigan in ANNIE and, perhaps most horrifying of all, the brain-frying, psychedelic sense-stomping songster Grand Wizard in THE WORST WITCH all serve to further underline sbd's cause. So here's to you TIM CURRY, this honor is well-earned and long overdue. You, my scene stealing, multi-talented friend, are one impossible to dispute Traumatizer!

    Kinder-News :: Evil On Two Legs' "Childhood Horrors"

    Posted on By unkle lancifer


    I would be remiss if I were not to inform y'all of a recent post over at EVIL ON TWO LEGS entitled "Childhood Horrors." It's a superb list of grade "A" traumatizers that I think you will really enjoy, plus they were kind enough to mention ye ol' Kindertrauma as well! That kinda made my day and was sorta like a bloggy neighbor dropping off a surprise Bundt cake on account of they rule. While you're there, make sure you look around and and stay awhile, there's tons of great stuff to dig through and those guys really know their horror! Jump to the post HERE!

    Traumafessions :: Reader Tom on Dragon Seed

    Posted on By unkle lancifer

    During World War II my parents took the family to see DRAGON SEED, a movie about the Japanese invasion of China. The tension built as the Japanese approached a small rural community. The family's grandmother was too obese to travel fast so they hid her in some bushes. The soldiers found her and raped her. Her hysterical crying remained with me throughout the war, reminding it could happen to my mother if we were invaded. To this day I have fears of being attacked because of invasion, whether by wars or into my home, car, etc.

    I must add my family, especially my very creative mother, were fans of the gothic. During the depression after my parents lost their farm we moved into a small, rural village. For lack of money and no special events in the community my mother would take us to the cemetery at night to tell us macabre stories as we sat on tombstones.

    We also lived in a very large home with a basement not unlike a dungeon. If I had to go to the basement, on return I would run up the stairs as many outstretched arms pursued me.

    At age 75, I am a very happy person!!!!!!!!!

    UNK SEZ: Tom, where do I even begin with such a stellar Traumafession? First of all, thanks for dispelling the notion that trauma is reserved for the horror genre. The truth is war, rape and fear for our loved ones trumps most of what is found in the average horror film. Secondly your mother is an inspiration, being taken to the local cemetery for some homemade brand-trauma tales sounds like a dream come true to me. And lastly thanks for including your age, not only does it illustrate the staying power of kindertraumas but their universality as well. I spend a lot of time fretting about getting older, but if I get to be half as cool as you clearly are, I'm looking forward to it!

    Traumafessions :: Reader Rachel On Gone With the Wind & David Frost

    Posted on By unkle lancifer

    My biggest child hood trauma would have to be an even split between GONE WITH THE WIND, as seen with my folks at a drive in at the tender age of 5 or 6 , and several children's records we would listen too all narrated by DAVID FROST.

    I am probably older than most readers here and grew up in South Africa, where television was only introduced in 1976. I have no childhood television memories to speak of, and we didn't frequent the movies very often. We read a lot of books, and had LP's with children's book narrations. We were as glued to them as any child today is glued to the TV screen. These LP where not musicals, but the narration was usually accompanied by music adding to the tension created by the deep and serious voice of DAVID FROST. Tubby the Tuba was the only one of the LP's that didn't scare the living daylights out of me….

    Jack and the Beanstalk's ever-coming Giant, whose large and heavy steps would vibrate the house (or so it seemed to me, would send me screaming to my mother, and to a nightmare filled night – or several.) The Pied Piper of Hamlin was another one that scared me to death (although I did like the mice) The seductiveness of his music, and the happy sounds of children disappearing though the streets echoing their laughter into the silence of god knows where terrified me. I don't think that I ever got to listen to the end of these records, or that I ever slept a good night sleep after listening to them – but still I would return, for more and more and more….

    As I said above – the other half of my child hood trauma is all about the amputation scene in GONE WITH THE WIND. (Probably many of you are wondering what exactly is so scary about that movie, especially as todays movies are a lot more revealing in blood and gore) I was so traumatized by that scene (my screaming obviously forced my parents to leave the drive-in with some haste,) that I refused to see that movie until I was about 25 years old…. at which point I did watch it in complete and utter boredom unable to understand how this is what had haunted me for so many years…

    UNK SEZ: Thanks Rachel. Rachel blogs about horror over at TOP HORROR MOVIES CLUB. A recent post even concerned Kindertrauma and her thoughts about just how young is too young to allow kids to experience scary films. Similar discussions recently took place at both VAULT OF HORROR and CLUB SILENCIO. I threw my two cents into all three, but you know your Unk, my creepy kiddies, I wouldn't trade my childhood kindertraumas for the world!

    Kinder-News :: Contest @ Horrors Of It All !!!

    Posted on By unkle lancifer


    Has your life turned into an endless void of drudgery and routine? Do you long to be surrounded by glamorous prizes that will make your enemies turn green with envy? Are you a fountain of untapped talent just itching for fame and notoriety? Well, are you? My advice is snap out of your self-pitying funk and head straight over to THE HORRORS OF IT ALL the interweb destination once committed to creating nightmares is now making life long dreams come true! A snazzy contest is now underway that will be judged by international celebrities with megaton star power! Will you be chosen? Are you even ready to be catapulted into eternal infamy? Do yourself a favor and find out now by hopping over to THOIA! Destiny is calling, are you brave enough to pick up the phone?

    Speaking of THE HORRORS OF IT ALL did you know that outstanding oasis provides perpetual entertainment in the form of pre-code comix at the, I'm not sh*tting you, price of exactly zero dollars and nothing cents? It's true. The magnificent Karswell was even kind enough to point myself in the direction of his most Kindertraumatic offerings! Follow the links below and discover a world of tiny tot terror that will have you squirming in your seats and profusely pondering THE HORRORS OF IT ALL!