Author: unkle lancifer

 

 I'll be honest with you, there's no way on earth I could be objective about a film that features both TOM ATKINS and a zombie cat. Even if this movie was utter crap, I'd still love it. Fortunately, this film is anything but. It's well known to many that NIGHT OF THE CREEPS, though not the most well-known classic, is a classic none the less. FRED DEKKER, who also helmed MONSTER SQUAD, may not have had laurels chucked at his head during the time he was actively filmmaking, but over the years, he has grown to be thought of as one of the great unheralded horror directors of the eighties. Other movies may have made more moolah, but his flicks are loved and I mean passionately. N.O.T.C. opens in outer space with midget aliens littering some tube of toxic crap upon our fair planet in 1950. After a few bars of "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes" and a black and white axe murder, we zoom to the present day circa 1986. Here we touch base with every known and adored '80s teen film cliché known to man. A dork (JASON LIVELY) loves a girl with a preppy snob boyfriend and will do anything to win her attention. In this case, he'll have to do some body snatching. The body snatched is contaminated with that alien funk from the '50s, and chaos, gore, action and comedy ensues. TOM ATKINS lends a hand as a hard boiled type who has previous experience with these sluggy, zombie-creating creatures from beyond and a holster filled with brilliant, perfectly timed one-liners. (I would say that this is ATKINS best performance ever, but I'm afraid that THE FOG and HALLOWEEN 3 will beat me up after school.) Besides being host to some truly endearing characters (JILL WHITLOW dressed to the nines carrying a blowtorch, STEVE MARSHALL as a put upon pal) and highly quotable dialogue ("Thrill me!"), N.O.T.C. navigates the horror/comedy balancing act with an ease that should be studied before being attempted by others. Unlike most alleged horror/comedies, the humor is never self-deprecating or cynical and always knows its place is in line behind characterization, suspense and exploding heads.

• The opening scene aliens deserve a movie of their own. So does the, "Screaming like banshees" janitor.
• What's not to like about a movie whose main characters go to Corman University, whose last names are Romero, Carpenter-Hooper and Cronenberg, and are aided by cops Landis and Raimi? Extra-bonus points for the DICK MILLER cameo.
• I'll be honest; there are too many indelible scenes to report. The whole second half is back-to-back incredible scenes. Even the scenes that didn't make the final cut are great. Check out an alternative and superior ending HERE.

 

  

 

Is CHRISTOPHER GEORGE the coolest guy who ever lived? There's plenty of evidence to support that theory. He had his own action figure, thanks to his stint on RAT PATROL. He was best buds with crooner JOHNNIE RAY (who was not only name dropped in the DEXYS MIDNIGHT RUNNER classic COME ON EILEEN but also inspired MORRISSEY'S hearing-aid fetish). He posed in PLAYGIRL, his niece is VANNA WHITE, he's worked along side folks as varied as JOHN WAYNE and LUCIO FULCI, and he was married to, and frequently costarred with the most beautiful woman in puppet land, LYNDA DAY GEORGE (Lucky BASTARD!). His grandest success may be his starring turn as Ranger Michael Kelly in GRIZZLY, the first film out of the gate in the animal run amuck gold rush that JAWS inspired. Bears, unlike sharks, who have unlovable ugly mugs, are kind of cute and cuddly. Even though if you met one in real life it probably would tear your face off, on screen they mostly inspire "Ahhhs" and have you wondering if you could fetch them a jar of honey. The bear in GRIZZY has this perception to work against throughout the film and the movie succeeds by alternating between adorable shots of the bear standing upright and less adorable shots of him bashing women's heads between tree trunks and decapitating innocent horses. I mean this bear is not kidding around. When our bear comes across a small albino-looking boy playing with a white rabbit in his yard, the viewer is right to assume a close call or cut away scene is on the horizon. Well not this time campers, this once PG-rated mountain of menace does not shy away from the red stuff. There's really only one man on earth that can take out a killing machine like the one described and that is our GEORGE. With a smirk, a wisecrack, a helicopter and a handy rocket launcher, he makes the woods safe again for children and bunnies everywhere. Directed by insane lunatic WILLIAM GIRDLER (DAY OF THE ANIMALS), GRIZZLY tastes like a s'mores and provides the same guilty pleasure as smearing a lightening bug into the asphalt to watch it's inwards glow.

• The bear's attack on the female hikers, that crazy shack is no place to hide!
• Not only does he kill a horse, he mauls its rider and buries him in the dirt!
• R.I.P mother, child and bunny rabbit
• Bear attacks the watch tower and pulverizes it and its contents
• GEORGE's wonderfully delivered "Shit!!!"