kindertrauma

Category: Caution: I break for geniuses!

The Perfume of the Lady in Black (1974)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I love when you finish a movie and the first thing you want to do is watch it again. FRANCESCO BARILLI's 1974 film THE PERFUME OF THE LADY IN BLACK (available on Netflix Streaming) is so stinking gorgeous that I begged for it not to end. If anyone ever asks me to list the most grossly underrated horror film I can think of, I now have an answer. I wasn't too far into it when I decided that no matter how the tale turned out, I would be a happy camper due to its lush, nonstop beauty and fantastic score but as it turned out, the slithery story it spun ended up being truly satisfying to me. If you venture in with expectations of a Giallo mystery with systematic kills, you'll get lost in the wallpaper but if you're looking for a dreamy psychological character study that refuses to nail things down, it's bliss. Try to imagine POLANSKI's THE TENANT told with SUSPIRA-style visuals with a lead character as stagnantly brittle as JULIANNE MOORE in SAFE. Now imagine the perfect shade of blue.

Wispy MIMSY FARMER plays Sylvia whose sheepish existence is crumbling beneath her. A family photo blasts her childhood traumas into her waking life and soon she is being tormented by her younger self, the mother she may have pushed off a building, ma's beastly lascivious beau and pretty much every lover, friend, acquaintance and neighbor in her life. Just forget trying to interpret what is "real" and what is a projection of Sylvia's psychosis, her demons have already won and "reality" is a sinking ship. Sylvia's inability to stop her past from bleeding into her present transforms everyone into the enemy and all are unanimously bent on (literally) consuming her. The horror present is sometimes devastatingly impalpable. There are scenes where Sylvia just pauses, takes in the surroundings she is alienated from and stands eerily baffled. Some horror fans may find the timidity pesky but it all builds up to a climax with razor sharp claws.

The title, tone, lack of availability and its defiance of categorization all probably helped to conceal this film from a proper audience, but I think a generation now more accustomed to art house horror hybrids courtesy of folks like DAVID LYNCH and films like DON'T LOOK NOW, JACOB'S LADDER and BLACK SWAN won't have too difficult a time swallowing this pill. PERFUME also cleverly references ALICE IN WONDERLAND which is a lovely touch. Sylvia's mischievous and deadly (at least to cats!) awoken inner child not only resembles and reads from the book ALICE but she also leads Sylva through the looking glass and down a fathomless rabbit hole in her mind. Finally it is Sylvia who is serving rather than being served at a (real or not) gruesomely mad tea party. Anyway I cannot recommend it more highly. It's one of the best Italian horror films I've ever seen and I would not only push horror fans toward it but also anyone who appreciates film. Its detractors can go ahead and claim it's slow and confounding, personally I devoured every enigmatic second.

Scream of Fear (aka Taste of Fear, 1961)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I don't get it. 1961's SCREAM OF FEAR (TASTE OF FEAR in the UK) was apparently both a critical and commercial hit upon release, so why does it so frequently get overlooked? How is it that this film, still gripping and creeptastic today, is not mentioned alongside the usual classics? I'm serious, I don't get it. It's s-o-o-o-o good. It's the title isn't it? Folks you have to give your movies memorable titles! I can't stress that enough. Just because my advice is half a century too late is no reason not to heed it.

SUSAN STRASBERG is wheelchair bound Penny Appleby. She travels to France to visit her estranged father and get a load of the stepmother she's never met. Once there she is informed that her pop is away on business, which is believable enough until she starts coming across his wide-eyed corpse in every other room in the house. The set up is familiar indeed. Is Peggy a fruitcake or is somebody effing with her head? The large inheritance that hangs in the balance seems to suggest the latter. I guess I'm a mental slowpoke because as much as I thought I knew what was going on, I didn't. This movie has more twists than a…think of something twisty for me….that!

What I find so exceptional about S.O.F. is the fact that even though it is a grounded in reality thriller, it huffs and puffs like a supernatural yarn and is just altogether haunting. The incredible black and white photography is partially to blame but the story itself leaves giant spaces for you to come to your own conclusions at times and you won't be blamed for suspecting something otherworldly is going down. One scene in particular that involves Dad's corpse being spied in a swimming pool is just a blaring punch of full-on horror. That scene should track down the scene from NIGHT OF THE HUNTER with SHELLEY WINTERS at the bottom of a lake and then propose marriage to it. They are the perfect couple because they both flip me out equally.

SCREAM OF FEAR is directed by SETH HOLT (THE NANNY 1965) and written by HAMMER regular JIMMY SANGSTER who deserves to be a household name in the world of horror. (Please just take a moment to gawk at his credits HERE.) STRASBERG is marvelous as brittle screamer Penny; ANN TODD, as the stepmom, is cool as a cucumber where most would have camped it up; RONALD LEWIS is top notch as the ever so helpful chauffer and guess who else shows up? CHRISTOPHER LEE. Man, I love seeing LEE in his earlier roles. Here he plays a French doctor who has the nerve to suggest that Penny's wheelchair routine is all in her head. Yeah, tell that to the horse who fell on her and broke her spine in three places Doc! LEE is in this about as much as he's in HORROR HOTEL (where he played an American) but as per usual, he's all you can look at when he's on screen.

This is a must-see thriller on par with the best and if you are a LEE groupie like I now realize I am or an appreciator of the glory of black and white, double that must-see. I tell you this because if you should happen to have the FEARNET Channel it's on twice today both at noon and at 10 PM. See, I caught it a couple days ago and I saved this review just for today. How do you like that? I've always thinking of you. If you don't have FEARNET you can find SCREAM OF FEAR shamefully hidden in a HAMMER DVD boxset. Why it does not have a special edition of its own, again, I have no frickin' clue. It's exemplary and I'm not just saying that because I love wheelchair movies.

Streaming Alert:: Hercules (1983)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

We're talking about Netflix Streaming again so…woot. With so much super crappy stuff going on in the world it seems dumb to stay mad at Netflix, especially when they offer great spectacular entertainment like the movie we're talking about today, the incredible HERCULES (1983). I must thank my golden pal Kate of LOVE TRAIN FOR THE TENEBROUS EMPIRE for today's choice. It was Kate's enthusiastic review (HERE) that convinced me that I had to check it out. Her always wonderful writing and choice selections of screenshots were convincing enough but the deal was set in stone when she informed me that this opus was directed by LOUIS COATES aka LUIGI COZZI, the man responsible for one of my starving eyeball's favorites feasts STAR CRASH.

As Kate mentions in her piece, Italian director CAOTES/COZZI tends to deliver snuggable rip-offs of American hits. STAR CRASH butted in line behind STAR WARS; the sticky CONTAMINATION plopped down in place after ALIEN, and HERCULES swipes pies from both CLASH OF THE TITANS and CONAN THE BARBARIAN's window. Talent borrows, genius steals and super geniuses steal and add Christmas lights and cleavage. If you want me to tell you the plot of HERCULES, have a nice wait. All I can say is that it offers the only satisfying explanation of the creation of the universe that I have ever heard and it supports my own personal theory that if there are higher powers at work, then they totally get off on sticking invisible "kick me!" signs on all of our backs.

Furthermore, I'll take LOU FERRIGNO over ARNOLD any day of the week. They both look like clown-crafted, ready-to-pop balloon animals but only LOU has humanity in his peepers. I don't even care that his voice is clearly dubbed in HERCULES, if I had my way, we'd all be dubbed. Hey, this is not a movie to turn towards if you are looking for master acting or lucid storytelling anyway. This is the type you just sit back and bask in the beauty of. I'm sorry but this truly is my idea of lovely, everything sparkles and glows and there are a thousand clashing colors and it's like huffing at the trash dump and seeing rats as stallions and roaches as swans. It's all swimming in makeshift extravagance and tin can opulence and fishing wire prosperity. If it doesn't cure you, then you are not sick. Words, schmords, blorbs. It's better to look at the pictures….

How To End Things With John Carpenter

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Recently I was expressing my disappointment in the ending of JOHN CARPENTER's THE WARD. My chagrin was inspired not only by the film's not so clever "surprise" revelation but also in the cheapy jump-scare that was to be THE WARD's final note. The more I gnawed the bone in my head the more I realized that I had every reason to find a weak closing from CARPENTER somewhat surprising; the guy has delivered some of the strongest film endings I can think of. In an effort to help me process my disgruntlement, let's say we take a look at a handful of my favorites. Please don't make me tell you there will be spoilers.

HALLOWEEN (1978)

"The Shape" is shot several times and falls off a second story balcony. Laurie Strode is all, "It was the Bogeyman?" and Loomis is all, "Yep." His confirmation is made all the more convincing when he looks to see where the maniac has landed and notices only a blank space where there should rightly be a dead bogeyman. Yikes! But this is not even the good part! CARPENTER, because he is so brilliant, takes us on a little tour of everyplace we've been that night. It's as if he's going to show us where Myers is hiding but he doesn't. We see the homes that moments ago were filled with horror standing quietly. We check out the living room where Laurie battled for her life and it looks like an empty stage. We hear Myers breathing and it's as if he has become a part of everything. To me, it's not so much the mystique of Myers that rattles the nerves but the way CARPENTER injects him into the once mundane settings. He expertly desecrates the everyday with darkness and brings evil (as the tagline warns) home. At the end of HALLOWEEN, "The Shape" whether you can visibly see him or not is everywhere.

THE FOG (1980)

Oh good, that betrayed leper ghost Blake has gotten his precious gold back and now everything is settled. Hold a grudge much? Now the scenic town of Antonio Bay can get back to normal. Hmmm, those ghosts kept saying they wanted to kill six people but I guess not. Looks like five people and a gold cross will suffice. At the end of THE FOG Father Malone (HAL HOLBROOK), rather than thanking his lucky stars and skipping town, decides to hang around church wondering aloud about why his life was spared. Blake and company are only too happy to quell his curiosity by backing their haunted boat up and tying up loose ends by decapitating his head. I think I can sum up THE FOG's ending by labeling it the coolest thing that I have ever seen in my life. CARPENTER gives us a worrying heads up then diverts our attention one way and then slams us from another. We're not even granted a moment to focus on Blake as he pulls back for the final blow. As his sword connects with Malone it lops off our view too. The screen turns black, we hear the squishy cut and then as if the saber had sliced through a pop tent during a storm, CARPENTER's rainfall score begins to pour down all over the closing credits. The timing is clockwork-precise and it's one flipping fantastic curtain drop.

THE THING (1982)

MacReady (KURT RUSSELL)'s feelings toward the slippery amorphous space visitor in THE THING are made abundantly clear when he says, "Yea, fuck you too!" and chucks a lit stick of dynamite in its direction. The shape-shifting creature is not an easy critter to dispose of and since its escape will mean the global annihilation of mankind, blowing up the entirety of Outpost 31 and hoping for the best is not a bad way to go. As the camp burns, Mac discovers another survivor in Childs (KEITH DAVID). Neither man can completely trust that the other is not hosting the entity and so they share a quiet suspicion-filled stand off. Take special note of this ending because the likelihood that you ever encounter something like it again in a studio picture is minimal. Rather than hand the audience a cathartic pacifier jump scare to send them on their satiated way, CARPENTER insists that viewers be kept in a state of unknowing just like the characters on screen. Over the years fans have sought concrete confirmations of the stalemate's eventual outcome. Is the bottle that Mac hands Childs contaminated? How come you can't see Child's breath in the cold? There is no answer and the paranoia of not being able to identify friend or foe is exactly what this film is concerned with underneath the goop and lobster legs. There lies the true horror, none of us can ever fully know one another; does it get any colder than that?

PRINCE OF DARKNESS (1987)

There's no question about whether the end of PRINCE OF DARKNESS left a mark, Kindertrauma has received enough traumafessions and "Name That Traumas!" about this movie's final moments to state, without a doubt, that it has. I can even tell you first hand that my little brother was treated to disturbing nightmares inspired by this film's close. There is something spectacularly eerie about it and it certainly brings new meaning to the phrase "ahead of its time." Last we saw Catherine Danforth (LISA BLOUNT) she was doing mankind a solid and jumping into a mirror/dimensional doorway in order to keep the devil at bay. Throughout the film characters have been receiving static filled shaky-cam dream transmissions from the future warning of cataclysmic events including, but not limited to, the rise of an anti-God. The dreams alter subtly each time they occur but they always show a dark figure emerging from a church and they always look like a fifth generation bootleg. The film ends with one last exposure to the dream and now we find that Catherine has replaced the demonoid figure in the future. We're in the "open to interpetation" zone here but one thing that's set in stone is the alarming power of the hard to pin down visual and the ominous voice and message that accompanies it. The transmission's repeated insistence that what we are seeing is real begins to have an effect and, at some point, it becomes somewhat hard to distinguish if the communication is trying to break through a dream within the film or the film itself. Seriously haunting.

IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS (1994)

We know that John Trent's (SAM NEIL) investigation into the disappearance of horror novelist Sutter Cane did not end well because he fills us in on his experiences from a padded room in an insane asylum. I suppose that spending time in a fictional town that shouldn't exist fighting off ancient dimension-stomping beasties straight out of LOVECRAFT would leave anyone feeling twitchy. How do you top the horror of discovering that the line between fiction and reality is one big joke? How about learning the punchline is you. Trent's stint in the loony bin is cut short by the technicality of the world falling to ruin. He stumbles down debris-strewn streets that lead him to a movie theater. Now playing is IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS starring himself and directed by JOHN CARPENTER. He watches what we have watched. He laughs, he cries, he goes insane.

This might be a good place for me to end things myself. IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS sums up nicely what the best JOHN CARPENTER films do. Whether he is placing the mask on our faces in HALLOWEEN; opening THE FOG with a POE quote asking, "Is all that we see or seem but a dream within a dream?"; leaving us with the same dilemma as Mac and Child's in THE THING; invading our nightmares with THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS; or simply suggesting, as he does with IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS, that reality is fast becoming fiction and vice versa, good CARPENTER tends to blur the line between onscreen and off and assimilate the viewer into the proceedings.

Perhaps the strongest thing about CARPENTER's most brilliant film endings is the implication that there is no ending. The deep vastness and over abundance of darkness in his premium work insures that every viewer receives a Tupperware container of angst to take home. Go ahead and try to lull yourself to sleep repeating, "It's only a movie, it's only a movie." The jig is up, CARPENTER knows that we know that it's not.

John Carpenter's The Ward

Posted on By unkle lancifer

It's safe to say that JOHN CARPENTER is my favorite director of all time. I may have been more fascinated by CRONENBERG for a wee while, but that was only during my artsy phase. CARPENTER has made the majority of my favorite films and I have returned to and watched his movies over again a zillion times. So really, I came to this conclusion using simple math. I admit I was a bit cautious approaching his latest, THE WARD but considering I count myself among the few who appreciated GHOSTS OF MARS, I figured my chances of being outraged enough to throw a trash can through a pizza shop window were slim. I wasn't expecting a tour de force, just a competent work with a few adornments that high-fived his previous films. So what if he lost some zing and vitality? I wasn't feeling too hot myself. In other words, my expectations were not too high or too low. I've already gotten so much from this filmmaker that demanding much more felt like being an ungracious turd.

No need for plot details, it's basically GIRL INTERRUPTED…BY A GHOST! Most of the film runs smooth as silk and desperation free. It looks crispy clean in general and J.C.'s lovely signature is present and clearly legible. The atmosphere is not especially strong for ghostly subject matter but select moments hit the right uncanny nerve. The man has an eye and that eye still impresses; there's a bounty of wonderful shots all filled with his exquisite affection for lines and angles. I will assume that the film would have benefited some from a score by CARPENTER himself but a CARPENTER-approved score will have to suffice. (Did I hear a nod toward SUSPIRIA?)

I also really dig the cast, AMBER HEARD is all types of engaging, both beautiful and convincingly staunch. MAMIE GUMMER, as a quirky inmate, reminds me of a young MERYL STREEP and that I'm blaming on her mom, MERYL STREEP. JARED HARRIS is outstanding as a Loomis-y shrink leaning on nuts himself. I'd love to see him become a recurring CARPENTER player as PLEASENCE and ATKINS have done before him. I think this is a fantastic movie up to a point…

The problem is the script and more precisely, the end of the script. The film follows familiar paths and that is fine and dandy but then all the sudden it tramps things up big time with a highly irritating, borderline excruciating twist. I had such a good time with the HALLOWEEN II-ish setting, the FOG-zombie ghost, THE THING-esque group dynamics and CARPENTER's overall swoopy snug as a straightjacket style that I thought I could forgive the insulting "reveal" but then something worse happened, something that I'm still trying to reconcile.

The film ends with (and you can't spoil the already rotten) a goddamn medicine cabinet scare! Have you ever gone on a perfect date and then at the end of the evening the so and so bends to kiss you and their breath smells like roadkill? It's not a good way to leave things. I can't be too hard on a movie that is mostly good. I suppose if it was released twenty years ago, it would have curled my toes and buttered my English muffin. The good news is that CARPENTER still has the serious chops and honestly I'll take this movie before many a recent offering from some of his peers. Now, somebody please get this poor guy a script with an ending that doesn't make me sneeze. I'm allergic to mold!

Streaming Alert! :: Black Death (2010)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

BLACK DEATH is one seriously hearty, satisfying movie. Damn everybody who has already seen it and neglected to demand I do the same. It is set during a nasty time period when nobody could get cable television but they could get the Bubonic plague. A young monk trapped in a love triangle with a beautiful girl and God joins up with a group of soldiers lead by the excellent SEAN BEAN in search of a rumored village where folks are fancy with necromancy and can resurrect the dead.

BLACK DEATH could be described as a horror adventure. I hesitate to reveal anything more because a marvelous part of the experience involves imagining what might lie on the path ahead. My only advice is to keep an open mind and to try to see things from as many sides as possible because it really thickens the broth of this stew. I don't know (or care) how accurate it may be, but I do know it's rub-your-eyes gorgeous often, exciting as hell in places, and ultimately surprisingly profound. I plan to write Valentines to all involved.

BLACK DEATH was directed by CHRISTOPHER SMITH, (CREEP, SEVERANCE, TRIANGLE) an accelerating talent who has yet to disappoint me. Because it concerns religion an added bonus is that once the film is done, you can go on to its IMDb message board and marvel at the wide variety of interpretations from brilliant to batshit crazy. Trust me, it may look like homework but it tastes like a feast and I guarantee this Netflix Streaming pick is better than anything playing in your local theater. Trust me, I'm not kidding. Watch it!

Dear Dead Delilah (1972)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I swear to God I'm not purposely trying to be the most unhip horror fan in the universe. Baby I was born this way. I've already stated my affection for crusty mansions, blood-stained doilies and cracked doll heads and now I must salute the incredible joy that is Southern-fried sud-goth. 1972's DEAR DEAD DELILAH is like a soap opera with axe murders rather than commercials and it's my favorite thing I've seen since the last favorite thing I've seen. Some people think it's boring and those people have no idea what they are talking about. Really, I'm beginning to think that "It's boring" is code for "There's dialogue." How can anyone not enjoy this movie?

Like all great stories, we begin in the past. In this case, we meet Little Luddy who is opposing her mother and preparing for an unapproved of date. She explains her actions to her mom who does not respond, not because she doesn't care but because she is chopped up with an axe. Years later an older, artsy Luddy (PATRICIA CARMICHAEL) is released from prison. She has nowhere to go but thanks to a fortuitous event (being hit in the head by a football!), she soon finds herself nursed back to heath and gainfully employed in a Tennessee mansion. The homestead is overseen by dying matriarch Deliah (AGNES MOOREHEAD) who has gathered her family together to divvy up the inheritance. Chaos, angry words and ultimately many an axe murder are the result when Delilah informs the congregated that the family fortune is hidden in the house and it's finder's keepers.

This being MOOREHEAD's final film appearance, I was fully prepared for the phone-in routine. Oh, me of little faith. AGNES is as sharp as ever and devours every line with acidic relish and her southern accent adds an extra bite to her performance. Her mere presence is enough to satisfy but someone up there must like me because she is not only there but she is also there in a motorized wheelchair! There is one scene where Delilah wheels her chair into a mausoleum and then, after a momentary scream, the chair comes whizzing out by itself and that is when my couch officially turned into cloud nine. Sure, the plot and execution of D.D.D. dips into veritable camp at times but the shear darkness of its humor is too aggressive to dismiss. Just because the film is having some fun doesn't mean it doesn't take its horror seriously.

DEAR DEAD DELILAH was written by author JOHN FARRIS the mind behind THE FURY and it's sadly the only film he ever directed. At times it has the cardboard drive-in vibe of S.F. BROWNRIGG (DON'T GO IN THE BASEMENT, DON'T OPEN THE DOOR!) but its flashes of dreamy surrealism, and taste for broad soap opera theatrics also brings DAVID LYNCH to mind. It is a bit rough around the edges (me likey) but it truly accomplishes some striking moments of eerie weirdness. Best of all, the various deaths of the conniving family members are as strong as anything in BAY OF BLOOD or FRIDAY THE 13TH. My life was a little bit more complete seeing Grandpa Walton (WILL GREER) stumble out of a smoke house carrying one hacked off hand in the other. I feel I was always meant to see that.

Like BLOOD AND LACE (1971) and MANSION OF THE DOOMED (1976) both of which I just discovered recently, I think D.D.D. is a sorely undervalued film. Why, even my trusted Encyclopedia of Horror is a naysayer! I even read one review that called it "typical." C'mon, can you really use a word like "typical" to describe a movie that exhibits decapitations via horseback, a forced heroin overdose, unexplained random optical effects and an axe blade used for foreplay? I guess the inheritance gimmick is passé but that's just a springboard. Truth told, I would have liked to have gotten to know Luddy a little better but the fact that she's such a unique proto-final girl is ultimately enough for me. I couldn't help but dig that her post incarceration experiences resemble those of dear Norman Bates in PSYCHO II. Anyway, don't get fooled by the consensus and haters to the left, if you're like me, a fuddy duddy who likes it bloody, give this often sneaky and slightly creaky crazy train a ride.

Cat People (1982)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Nearly every major genre picture let loose in the early eighties regardless of its original reception has seemed to have garnered classic status at this point. Not so much PAUL SCHRADER's 1982 feline fantasia CAT PEOPLE. It certainly has a devout following of sorts but you are unlikely to bump into many horror gadflies sporting its iconography on a T-shirt at a convention. Kitty doesn't carry much "cool" cache and who or what's to blame?

I guess the puss-centric title alone can never impress onlookers with one's endurance mettle and what's the point of horror fandom if you're not theoretically upsetting oldsters with your wardrobe and accessories? As far as I see it, CAT PEOPLE is one of the more fascinating flicks to spring out of its era and although it's a remake of a popular work, there's no denying its sharp originality and sometimes bizarrely personal vision. It's further proof as if we needed any, that PAUL SCHRADER knows a thing or two about obsession (see also: TAXI DRIVER) and transformation (see also: MISHIMA: A LIFE IN FOUR CHAPTERS.)

Is the premise ridiculous or is there simply no place in the world for a fantasy film aimed at adults? Irena Gallier (severely beautiful NASTASSJA KINSKI) ventures to post card perfect New Orleans to reunite with her long lost brother Paul (a bristled MALCOLM McDOWELL). She entrances zoo keeper Oliver (JOHN HEARD), complicates matters for his pal with benefits Alice (the only believable competition for KINSKI, ANNETTE O'TOOLE) and along the way learns that like her brother, having sex turns her into a crazy murderous panther. Some folks get up in arms declaring that the film expresses a fear of female sexuality but I think that pretty much ignores the obvious fact that Paul, Irena's brother has the same meow-glitch. Paul's solution to the perils of panther-gasm is that he and his sister keep it on the down low with some incest since by the way, their parents were siblings too! Now if you get all hung up on incest ick factor you'll miss what I think is the film's central issue; Irena is essentially being told that she can either follow family sanctioned sexual tradition or become a monster.

I am a huge fan of the 1942 version of CAT PEOPLE too. Produced by VAL LEWTON and directed by JACQUES TURNER, the original stands high above its peers in its grasp of psychology and is an extraordinary exercise in quiet manipulation. The remake attracts grief for upping the gore and nudity ante but to pretend that those elements negate what's interesting about the rest of the film is just all kinds of lazy. Just because a gal frequently finds herself in a nude mood doesn't mean she's not deep. Irena spends the lion's share of the film developing a way to free herself from others, particularly her family's expectations (as represented by a gnarled and ominous tree). She yearns to break free from tradition, to explore an ill-advised union with Oliver but picket fences just aren't in the tarot deck. The inescapable tragedy of the matter is made clear when she receives advice from the jailed (also caged) "Female" (rhymes with tamale), her brother's once caretaker/enabler played by the great RUBY DEE, "Live as he (Paul) did, never love, pretend the world is as men think it is." She then adds for good measure "It doesn't matter where you go."

No, it doesn't matter where Irena goes, as the ultimate dilemma is herself. Her soul may desire whatever it wants but the mechanics of her body have final say. What SCHRADER is really interested in, I think, is the war between predatory (Paul) and romantic (Irena) love and there's a whole lot at stake when Irena, at least for a while (the pool scene), seems to have gone to her brother's side of the yard. (Speaking of family, the scenes of Irena stalking her rival Alice illustrate NASTASSJA's ability to summon her father's vampiric leer at will.)

I suppose there are many reasons to drop out of CAT PEOPLE and become a non fan: the pacing is a bit off, there's many a false climax and it does lose its footing here and there but really you're loony if you can't enjoy the sight of KINSKI simply pouncing about New Orleans in its prime to a GIORGIO MORODER score. That's not even mentioning the beautifully realized dream landscapes and the awesome sight of ED BEGLEY JR.'s arm being ripped from his shoulder. You'll never find quite the gumbo mentioned above in any other movie, I promise. I guess the whole panther transformation bit can come across as silly but humanized animals are a staple when it comes to fables and that just happens to be exactly CAT PEOPLE's turf.

The Rapture (1991)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Is the world over yet? Is it okay if I am disappointed either way? I don't mind being left behind and unchosen as long as I get some answers. I'm used to being picked last and if God turns out to be some giant bully in the sky collecting belief and love like lunch money, I'm fine with that. Honestly if I were God, I wouldn't care if anyone believed in me at all, I'd stomp out the human race as a failed experiment regardless and leave the Earth to the plants and animals. I wouldn't stand for modern culture mucking up my terrarium. I'd ferment all the fruit in the trees and let the monkeys and elephants get wasted! It's not like they have to drive home or anything. If God created drunk caterpillars, willow trees and fish tacos then I certainly do love him but am I really expected to worship an entity who is more passive-aggressive than me? It's difficult.

1991's MICHAEL TOLKIN film THE RAPTURE is simply unforgettable which makes it all the more strange that it is mostly forgotten; I guess asking questions and not saying exactly what people want to hear isn't the best way to be popular-who knew? MIMI ROGERS brings new meaning to the word revelation as Sharon, a woman bored out of her skull by her stupid job who has a bunch of random sex because it's almost like not feeling bored anymore. One day she notices that folks who have found God are even happier than folks who have foursomes that include DAVID DUCHOVNY and so she decides to get born again. God's love has a price though and soon the invisible taskmaster is forcing her to jump through many a hoop. I've watched enough Oprah to identify a toxic relationship when I see one. Face it Sharon, he's just not that into you.

When I first saw THE RAPTURE it shook me like a shake weight. No matter what your personal beliefs are it is sure to challenge them. Rather than painting Sharon as a loon waiting for a ship that never comes in, it pushes her smack dab into the middle of the apocalypse, trumpets blaring and all. Yes, the end of the world does arrive as predicted but not before Sharon has lost everything that made the world's destruction worth giving a crap about. I think Sharon's spiritual journey is rather an admirable one. What's infinitely less admirable is the fact that once she has a child, she drags her offspring along for the ride too. She's not a bad person, it's just that her belief system has painted her into a corner where critical thinking is no longer an option. To even question God is an act of treachery. Her faith is strong just not strong enough to withstand a moments scrutiny.

Because it concerns religion, THE RAPTURE is sure to offend some folks but writer/director TOLKIN is hardly being provocative for the sake of being provocative. The film takes its subject matter seriously and has a sincere curiosity about exactly what the unequivocal existence of God would mean. THE RAPTURE bypasses the usual stalemate of belief vs. non-belief and jumps ahead to the next ladder rung. God exists alright but he has some serious explaining to do. Judgment Day arrives but, in a crazy switch-a-roo, it is God who is judged. It may seem blasphemous to some but if the act of wondering and questioning is a sin then damn me now. I don't know what God you believe in, but mine can handle some constructive criticism without a hissy fit.

You really do not have to believe in anything to enjoy THE RAPTURE besides good storytelling and the power of film. Somehow its low-budget makeshift end of the world is emotionally devastating on an epic scale. TOLKIN's insistence that the demolition of one spirit be accountable for, coupled with ROGER's undaunted performance is ultimately as moving as any hymn. If THE MIST got you hot under the collar than you might want to take a rain check but if you welcome an investigation into the spiritual without the usual cowardly boundaries I say step forward, there's no reason to linger in limbo.

Unk's Most Favorite Horror Scores

Posted on By unkle lancifer

UNK SEZ: I don't know if these are the best scores (Hey, where's Tubular Bells?!) but they are my personal favorites. Hope I didn't neglect too many! BTW, both TENTACLES and THE VISITOR just barely missed the cut!

SUSPIRIA (GOBLIN)

Let's just get this one taken care of immediately. How can any list of horror scores not include this madness? So big, so brazen it nearly kicks the movie itself right off the screen! No small feat!

BRAM STOKER'S DRACULA (WOJIECH KILAR)

A good score lets you know what's going down right off the bat. Sure this film is plenty romantic but KILAR's work makes sure you remember there's plenty of anger and vengeance seeping through its veins as well.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME (LANCE RUBIN)

LANCE RUBIN is not only the name of me after I marry JENNIFER RUBIN, but it is also the name of the guy who did the score for one of my favorite slashers. The music box combo of sweet and creepy weaves throughout the film and culminates in a memorable theme song sung by SYREETA! If RUBIN's work sounds a tad familiar it may be due to his talent lodging in another classic, MOTEL HELL!

PHANTASM (FRED MYROW & MALCOLM SEAGRAVE)

THE SHINING used to have this spot until I found out that most of its music is not original to the film. That's alright, I was feeling bad about leaving out PHANTASM anyway and now I don't have to. Listen to how sad it is! It sounds like the seventies and it sounds like rain and it makes me want to go on a tandem bicycle excursion with KAREN CARPENTER. Shit, that makes me think of THE ATTIC and how I should have put THE ATTIC in here as well. Damn self-imposed deadlines!

CAT PEOPLE (GIORGIO MORODER)

MORODER is the man and his soundtrack for PAUL SCHRADER's Meow Mix is something y'all need to get your paws on. Its influence is still felt to this day in fact, the band GOLDFRAPP recently admitted that their last album was strongly influenced by MORODER's efforts here! That's some staying power!

THE THING (ENNIO MORRICONE)

Wow. I guess you know you kind of rule when JOHN CARPENTER decides to hand over musical duties to you rather than tackling them himself. Well, MORRICONE is a legend and his minimalistic, heartbeat mimicking, icy cold contribution to CARPENTER's film fits like a snug glove.

PSYCHO II (JERRY GOLDSMITH)

Talk about big shoes to fill. (Not that anyone involved in the making of this sequel didn't have more than their work cut out for them.) JERRY GOLDSMITH pays homage to and follows trails paved by the great BERNARD HERRMANN but he adds something uniquely his own too. Almost as if in cahoots with ANTHONY PERKINS' performance, GOLDSMITH sways you toward the tragic and sympathetic side of Norman Bates' soul. Look out! Once in your head, very hard to evict!

CARRIE (PINO DONAGGIO)

Speaking of BERNARD HERRMANN, composer PINO DONAGGIO does a fine job of tipping his hat toward the guy too. Sure, screechy stabby violins will always owe a debt to PSYCHO but PINO brings an extraordinary sincere velvet dark melancholy to the table too. I know this score like the back of my hand and I love it even though some of the creepy church vibes bring back strange unwanted memories of the DAVEY AND GOLIATH show. Aw, that reminds me I should not have forgotten CARNIVAL OF SOULS on this list either! I'll just shove it in here. Cassie won't mind, er, I mean Carrie…

CANDYMAN (PHILIP GLASS)

Not everybody digs PHILIP GLASS but you have to admit that he's an inspired choice for the soundtrack to CANDYMAN. His signature repetitive synth blips reek of urban insect existence. I'm gonna rate this baby extra high on originality alone and for the simple fact that "Helen's Theme" may be one of the most beautiful things that ever happened to my ridiculous ears. Here be the proverbial bee's knees…

THE FOG (JOHN CARPENTER)

Number one score for me forever for sure. I know CARPENTER's HALLOWEEN theme will always shadow over his other fine work but the truth is, on an emotional level it can't really hold a candle to what he accomplishes with THE FOG score. Sometimes gentle, slight and ethereal, sometimes pounding like a primal alarm to flee. It does more than set the mood, it blankets you in the otherworldly and it does not let go as it pushes you further and further away from safety. To put it simply, THE FOG score sounds like a ghost story being told without words…

UNK SEZ: that's my top ten folks but wait I'm not done yet! Here are TWO EXTRA BONUS TRACKS!

My choice for outstanding opening theme song goes to ROSEMARY'S BABY by KRZYSTOF KOMEDA featuring MIA FARROW!

…And my choice for most annoying theme song goes to TOURIST TRAP! I love you TOURIST TRAP (and PINO DONAGGIO) but once I fell asleep with your DVD in the player and woke up to a menu screen playing this track over and over and I just about lost what little of my mind I had left.