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Category: Stream Warriors

Streaming Alert! :: Tom Karpe of Holy Karpe on Not Quite Hollywood

Posted on By aunt john

I just watched on Netflix streaming a great documentary called NOT QUITE HOLLYWOOD. It's about the rise of Australian cinema during the 1970s, '80s, and early '90s.

It starts off by discussing the crude sex comedies of Australian cinema that marked the divergence from the creation of critically acclaimed historic dramas. Then the documentary goes into the wild horror and ridiculous action movies. I recognized most of the horror flicks from my youth but I had no idea about the historical context.

I just wanted to let you guys know how good this documentary is and that I've added a lot of the titles mention in it to my Netflix Queue.

Sincerely,

Tom Karpe

— Holy Karpe

UNK SEZ:: Thanks Tom Karpe for providing us with today's STREAM WARRIORS suggestion! I could not agree with you more NOT QUITE HOLLYWOOD really is a must see. It's not only immensely entertaining itself but it provides the viewer with a ton of ideas on what to watch next!

The Perfume of the Lady in Black (1974)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I love when you finish a movie and the first thing you want to do is watch it again. FRANCESCO BARILLI's 1974 film THE PERFUME OF THE LADY IN BLACK (available on Netflix Streaming) is so stinking gorgeous that I begged for it not to end. If anyone ever asks me to list the most grossly underrated horror film I can think of, I now have an answer. I wasn't too far into it when I decided that no matter how the tale turned out, I would be a happy camper due to its lush, nonstop beauty and fantastic score but as it turned out, the slithery story it spun ended up being truly satisfying to me. If you venture in with expectations of a Giallo mystery with systematic kills, you'll get lost in the wallpaper but if you're looking for a dreamy psychological character study that refuses to nail things down, it's bliss. Try to imagine POLANSKI's THE TENANT told with SUSPIRA-style visuals with a lead character as stagnantly brittle as JULIANNE MOORE in SAFE. Now imagine the perfect shade of blue.

Wispy MIMSY FARMER plays Sylvia whose sheepish existence is crumbling beneath her. A family photo blasts her childhood traumas into her waking life and soon she is being tormented by her younger self, the mother she may have pushed off a building, ma's beastly lascivious beau and pretty much every lover, friend, acquaintance and neighbor in her life. Just forget trying to interpret what is "real" and what is a projection of Sylvia's psychosis, her demons have already won and "reality" is a sinking ship. Sylvia's inability to stop her past from bleeding into her present transforms everyone into the enemy and all are unanimously bent on (literally) consuming her. The horror present is sometimes devastatingly impalpable. There are scenes where Sylvia just pauses, takes in the surroundings she is alienated from and stands eerily baffled. Some horror fans may find the timidity pesky but it all builds up to a climax with razor sharp claws.

The title, tone, lack of availability and its defiance of categorization all probably helped to conceal this film from a proper audience, but I think a generation now more accustomed to art house horror hybrids courtesy of folks like DAVID LYNCH and films like DON'T LOOK NOW, JACOB'S LADDER and BLACK SWAN won't have too difficult a time swallowing this pill. PERFUME also cleverly references ALICE IN WONDERLAND which is a lovely touch. Sylvia's mischievous and deadly (at least to cats!) awoken inner child not only resembles and reads from the book ALICE but she also leads Sylva through the looking glass and down a fathomless rabbit hole in her mind. Finally it is Sylvia who is serving rather than being served at a (real or not) gruesomely mad tea party. Anyway I cannot recommend it more highly. It's one of the best Italian horror films I've ever seen and I would not only push horror fans toward it but also anyone who appreciates film. Its detractors can go ahead and claim it's slow and confounding, personally I devoured every enigmatic second.

Streaming Alert :: Horror Hotel (aka City of the Dead)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Did you know that you can watch full length movies for free on YouYube? You don't even have to feel like a mooch when you do it because these movies are in the public domain and are therefore owned by YOU! Some of these movies stink but some are incredibly excellent like the one I'm going to talk about today, 1960's HORROR HOTEL. I know the title makes it sound dopey but that's just because it has been dumbed down for American audiences and it's really called CITY OF THE DEAD. This spooky gem is one of the better horror movies, one of the better witch movies and one of the better black and white films. If you watch it on your computer, fog will seep out of your keyboard. I swear.

HORROR HOTEL is about a young college student named Nan who travels to a small New England town to research a paper on witchcraft on the advice of her professor. The excursion seems sensible enough until the moment she arrives at the town and finds it to be the creepiest place on Earth. Nan grabs a room at the suspiciously named Raven's Inn and slowly discovers that the town is sitting in Satan's paw and that the Inn's owner looks a hell of a lot like a notorious witch that was burned at the stake a couple hundred years ago. Spooky unpredictable things ensue.

Some movies just vibrate with a supernatural power all their own and this is one of them. Calling this movie atmospheric is like calling the ocean damp or a tornado breezy. If you've ever enjoyed a stay in Dunwich, Hobb's End or Potter's Bluff you need to book a stay in the HORROR HOTEL's thankfully fictional Whitewood, Massachusetts. Besides accomplishing a pitch-perfect, eerie mood, this a move that knows no fear on a storytelling level. The good guys need to be more than just good to survive. Another major selling point is the presence of CHRISTOPHER LEE as Nana's bad advice giving teacher. You'll see exactly why LEE is an icon as he is consistently mesmerizing throughout. Cobras should use CHRISTOPHER LEE movies to train their offspring.

The full movie is below but if ya' need to see it bigger, just click on the corner and transport yourself over to the YouTube. HORROR HOTEL is directed by JOHN MOXEY (CIRCUS OF FEAR) and written by MILTON SUBOTSKY (THE VAULT OF HORROR) & GEORGE BAXT (The equally exceptional BURN, WITCH, BURN!) Enjoy your stay!

Streaming Alert:: Hercules (1983)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

We're talking about Netflix Streaming again so…woot. With so much super crappy stuff going on in the world it seems dumb to stay mad at Netflix, especially when they offer great spectacular entertainment like the movie we're talking about today, the incredible HERCULES (1983). I must thank my golden pal Kate of LOVE TRAIN FOR THE TENEBROUS EMPIRE for today's choice. It was Kate's enthusiastic review (HERE) that convinced me that I had to check it out. Her always wonderful writing and choice selections of screenshots were convincing enough but the deal was set in stone when she informed me that this opus was directed by LOUIS COATES aka LUIGI COZZI, the man responsible for one of my starving eyeball's favorites feasts STAR CRASH.

As Kate mentions in her piece, Italian director CAOTES/COZZI tends to deliver snuggable rip-offs of American hits. STAR CRASH butted in line behind STAR WARS; the sticky CONTAMINATION plopped down in place after ALIEN, and HERCULES swipes pies from both CLASH OF THE TITANS and CONAN THE BARBARIAN's window. Talent borrows, genius steals and super geniuses steal and add Christmas lights and cleavage. If you want me to tell you the plot of HERCULES, have a nice wait. All I can say is that it offers the only satisfying explanation of the creation of the universe that I have ever heard and it supports my own personal theory that if there are higher powers at work, then they totally get off on sticking invisible "kick me!" signs on all of our backs.

Furthermore, I'll take LOU FERRIGNO over ARNOLD any day of the week. They both look like clown-crafted, ready-to-pop balloon animals but only LOU has humanity in his peepers. I don't even care that his voice is clearly dubbed in HERCULES, if I had my way, we'd all be dubbed. Hey, this is not a movie to turn towards if you are looking for master acting or lucid storytelling anyway. This is the type you just sit back and bask in the beauty of. I'm sorry but this truly is my idea of lovely, everything sparkles and glows and there are a thousand clashing colors and it's like huffing at the trash dump and seeing rats as stallions and roaches as swans. It's all swimming in makeshift extravagance and tin can opulence and fishing wire prosperity. If it doesn't cure you, then you are not sick. Words, schmords, blorbs. It's better to look at the pictures….

Streaming Alert! :: Kinderpal Mickster on Jack's Back (1988)

Posted on By kinderpal mickster

UNK SEZ: Aunt John and I have gone fishing but don't worry, as I was able to coax everybody's Kinderpal Mickster into recommending one of her faves for you. Thanks Mickster!

MICKSTER SEZ: Netflix isn't the only place that offers obscure horror movies instantly. Hulu.com is another good source for instant streaming. The best part is that Hulu.com is free. The only caveat is that you have to watch commercials every ten to fifteen minutes; however, it is worth it when you come across a movie that has not been released on DVD. This brings me to my recommendation for the week, JACK'S BACK (1988). I first discovered this little known gem on USA's UP ALL NIGHT during the early '90s.

It is one hundred years after the original Jack the Ripper murders in London, and a serial killer in Los Angeles is meticulously recreating the killings. If you like Jack the Ripper-themed movies, you should enjoy this one. It does not hurt that JAMES SPADER is so damn hot in this. He plays twins John and Rick Wesford. John being the straight-laced med student and Rick being the "bad-boy" shoe store manager. The supporting cast includes ROBERT PICARO (THE HOWLING) , ROD LOOMIS (aka Sigmund Freud from BILL & TED'S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE) and CYNTHIA GIBB.

Mickster's Special Moments:

  • "Red Harvest" playing, as the Polaroid develops to reveal a dead prostitute.
  • The Ripper enjoys singing "My Way" in the shower to prepare for killing hookers.
  • John's unfortunate demise after being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
  • Rick wakes from a nightmare (about John's death) and rolls around on the bed in his underwear… Yay!
  • Rick teams up with the John's cute and spunky co-worker Chris to catch Jack the Ripper.
  • The porn theater sells guns but not bullets
  • Rick knocks "Red-Herring Jack" on his ass.
  • The final showdown with Jack the Ripper.

Streaming Alert! :: Black Death (2010)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

BLACK DEATH is one seriously hearty, satisfying movie. Damn everybody who has already seen it and neglected to demand I do the same. It is set during a nasty time period when nobody could get cable television but they could get the Bubonic plague. A young monk trapped in a love triangle with a beautiful girl and God joins up with a group of soldiers lead by the excellent SEAN BEAN in search of a rumored village where folks are fancy with necromancy and can resurrect the dead.

BLACK DEATH could be described as a horror adventure. I hesitate to reveal anything more because a marvelous part of the experience involves imagining what might lie on the path ahead. My only advice is to keep an open mind and to try to see things from as many sides as possible because it really thickens the broth of this stew. I don't know (or care) how accurate it may be, but I do know it's rub-your-eyes gorgeous often, exciting as hell in places, and ultimately surprisingly profound. I plan to write Valentines to all involved.

BLACK DEATH was directed by CHRISTOPHER SMITH, (CREEP, SEVERANCE, TRIANGLE) an accelerating talent who has yet to disappoint me. Because it concerns religion an added bonus is that once the film is done, you can go on to its IMDb message board and marvel at the wide variety of interpretations from brilliant to batshit crazy. Trust me, it may look like homework but it tastes like a feast and I guarantee this Netflix Streaming pick is better than anything playing in your local theater. Trust me, I'm not kidding. Watch it!

Stream Warriors :: With Special Guest Host John Squires of Freddy In Space!

Posted on By unkle lancifer

UNK SEZ: Today's Stream Warriors is hosted by none other than JOHN SQUIRES of FREDDY IN SPACE! He's got some killer picks for you kids today, so lend him your ear!

MONSTER DOG
Like peanut butter and jelly, some pairings were just meant to go together, as if by a decree handed down by God himself. If ya ask me, Claudio Fragasso and a video camera is one of these divine pairings. Just a few years before creating his masterpiece, Troll 2, Fragasso lensed a little gem called Monster Dog, an Alice Cooper star vehicle that saw the Coop battling off a horde of vicious dogs … and a bunch of hillbilly dudes … and a giant werewolf monster. I don't know how the Italian director and the American rock god ended up in bed together, but I'm sure glad they did.

In the film, a dubbed over Cooper plays Vince Raven, a rocker who returns to his hometown with some friends to film his latest music video, only to discover that the grounds are hunted by a pack of killer dogs (aka a bunch of friendly looking pet pooches dubbed to sound angry.) Turns out they are ruled over by a giant Monster Dog, which may or may not be Cooper himself given his father may or may not have passed on the weird heart condition he had that made the townsfolk think he was the titular monster, which he may or may not have actually been.

Flirting with the zombie movie, the werewolf movie, the killer dog movie and even the spaghetti western shoot 'em up flick, Monster Dog is rife with that same peculiar and even otherworldly quality that makes Troll 2 so gosh darn lovable. It's admittedly not as compelling as Troll 2 throughout much of its runtime, but there's some real tasty morsels in there including a couple highly catchy faux Alice Cooper music videos as well as his transformation into a werewolf at the end, which is worth the wait in and of itself. What's not to love about Alice Cooper wearing makeup and a ruffled sleeve jacket while talking in someone else's voice and blowing off hillbilly heads before ultimately turning into a monster dog himself? If you answered "absolutely nothing," then you should the hit play button on this one as soon as possible.

CRAWLSPACE
Few people are more captivating to watch, both onscreen and off, than the late German actor Klaus Kinski; a pariah to all those who worked with him and a real treasure to those of us who just get to sit back and watch from afar while he does his thing. As deranged Nazi landlord Karl Gunther, who loves nothing more than to stalk his beautiful female tenants, kill them with D.I.Y. traps that would make John Kramer jealous, talk to his imprisoned and tongueless friend and play solo games of Russian Roulette each night before bed (with a bullet with his name literally etched into it), Kinski is at his most captivating and utterly creepy best.

I first discovered the film when I found a copy of it on VHS at a yardsale several years back and instantly fell in love with its totally off the wall and completely original vibe. It's fast paced with a weirdness scale that escalates by the minute and it's frankly unlike any other movie I've ever seen. The majority of that praise is all thanks to Mr. Kinski, who brings to the proceedings one of the most interesting and unsettling killers in all of '80s horror, a mix between Dr. Kevorkian and Adolf Hitler himself (who Gunther delights in watching footage of while prancing around with lipstick smeared all over his creepy little face).

Maybe I'm biased given that I could sit down and watch Kinski watch paint dry for an hour and a half and be completely amused and interested, but I've gotta say that Crawlspace is one of the best little known horror flicks circulating out there. The coolest thing about it being on Netflix Instant is that the only DVD release of the film, which saw it paired up with 1980's The Attic, is long out of print and fetches upwards of $40 these days. So be sure to check it out before its instant status is revoked. Oh and you also might want to watch "Please Kill Mr. Kinski" afterwards, a nine minute little short documentary the director of Crawlspace made after Kinski's death as a sort of oddball tribute to the notoriously volatile actor. It can be watched in full over on YouTube.

AFRAID OF THE DARK
Imagine being completely blind and living in a city that is being stalked by a slasher who is targeting … blind people. This is the premise of Afraid of the Dark, a fascinating early '90s export from Britain that sees a curious little boy taking it upon himself to investigate the attacks and ensure that the blind community in town, which includes his own mother, is kept safe. Unfortunately, that's just about all I can say about the movie because it's the kind of film that's best to go into without knowing a lick about it. The whole movie basically shifts gears about halfway through and it's a completely disorienting and thought provoking journey into the psyche of both children and blind people and to really comment much on it would spoil some of that mystique. What I will say though is that this film is a perfect example of why I love Netflix's Watch Instantly feature so much. It exposes you to films you've never seen and oftentimes have never even heard of before, films that you probably either wouldn't add to your queue or wouldn't even know about to add to your queue, but ones that you will be more willing to delve into when they're right there in front of you for the taking. Afraid of the Dark is one of those movies that I had never even heard a peep about before and I'm thankful to Netflix for introducing me to it. It is films like this one that make me a bona fied Stream Warrior, loud and proud!

UNK SEZ: Thanks for the excellent recommendations! Kinderkids, make sure you stop by JS's home base FREDDY IN SPACE very soon and very often! SQUIRES' enthusiasm for horror is pretty much unmatched so there's NO chance you won't enjoy yourself THERE!

Happy Father's Day! :: The Horseman

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I wanted to pick a special Father's Day Netflix Streaming movie and decided to go with the stompy Ozzie revenge flick THE HORSEMAN! I should warn you upfront though that this movie is extremely violent. In fact, I even caught myself closing ONE of my eyes and in retrospect, I have no idea how I thought that might help. I'm also afraid that it does some skipping through the torture zone. I'm not a fan of on-screen torture myself. It's almost always gratuitously sadistic and I just think it's rude to tie somebody to a chair. A lot of people are tied to a lot of chairs in this movie. I really wish that characters that find themselves in that position would just hand over the requested information and not be so ornery and antagonistic for my sake. Sassing makes everything more difficult for all involved. Spill the beans, dummy.

Christian (I know, pointed name considering the film's title right?) played by PETER MARSHALL (not the HOLLYWOOD SQUARES guy) is a dad who learns his daughter is dead. Her drugged-up, contaminated remains were just sort of dumped like trash by an anonymous person. His grief is thrown another whammy when he receives a VHS porn tape in the mail with his daughter featured in it, clearly out of her mind on drugs and being abused by a group of men. It's pretty gross. Christian, who fittingly works in pest control, grabs a toolbox and hits the road on a rampage, inflicting retribution to all those involved. I'm not saying his way of going about things is right but I'm not totally against it either. Karma is always sitting down on the job so sometimes you have to give it a little push…with a crowbar.

What raises THE HORSEMAN above the standard comeuppance flick is its commitment to examining a man's emotional pain in between skull cracking sessions. First time director STEVEN KASTRISSIOS displays real talent and thankfully he nabbed a superior actor to join him. MARSHALL is great in this and even if you find his actions questionable, you'll never doubt the intensity of his mournful rage. Along his travels Christian encounters a lonely hitchhiker not unlike his daughter named Alice (CAROLINE MAROHASY) and their relationship allows for even more of his humanity to emerge. When Alice inadvertently (and perhaps unavoidably) gets tangled in Christian's campaign of violence, a whole new level of discomfort for poor me is reached.

THE HORSEMAN is on the harsh side (I could have lived without the several instances of penis abuse) but I have to give it props nonetheless. I enjoy my violence a smidge more cartoon-y, but I do appreciate the film's reluctance to simplify physical anguish and give the viewer an easy out. There are no easy ways out here. The point is clearly made that it is more than Christian's ego that has been damaged and more than his pride that has been taken away. He let his daughter down and now he faces a tsunami of guilt that can't be bashed away. I guess the truth is, most Dads fuck up. None can completely shield their children from the dangerous world. I picked this film to celebrate the dads that are THERE anyway, the ones that show up to make the mistakes. The ones that at least TRY to give their kids a better life than they had. Christian isn't going to win any Father of the Year awards any time soon, but hey, he cares. That deserves at least a card or maybe a monogrammed crowbar.

NOTE: Happy Father's Day to my dad who is in the hospital (don't worry he is fine and will be out soon)! As far as I know he is not in the hospital for getting in fights with hooligans on my behalf but he is a super cool guy (imagine THE GREAT SANTINI crossed with Ted Baxter) anyway. Happy Father's Day!

Streaming Alert: I Start Counting (1969)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I have a superb and seldom seen recommendation for you guys today. This is exactly the type of near impossible to find treasure that keeps me so enthusiast about Netflix Streaming. 1969's I START COUNTING (based on a novel by Audrey Erskine-Lindop) is a coming of age horror/thriller and it fits nicely as a sort of missing link between HITCHCOCK's SHADOW OF A DOUBT and 1985's SMOOTH TALK. It stars a young JENNY AGUTTER, who you're sure to know from AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON, and it's directed by DAVID GREENE who also helmed THE SHUTTERED ROOM (1967). From what I can tell it never made an appearance in the US, either in theaters or on television. The subject matter does walk a fine, leering line sometimes but to me, it reads more frank than exploitive.

AGUTTER plays Wynne, a fourteen-year-old who has developed a fervent crush on her much older (he's 32) half-brother George (BRYAN MARSHALL). This situation would be complicated enough but as Wynne's obsession leads to stalking she also finds many a reason to suspect that George is directly responsible for all of the dead ladies that have been popping up all over town. Rather than allow George's apparent violent, deviant side to dissuade her though, Wynne grows more and more infatuated and condoning while her courting of danger escalates. Again and again she finds herself gravitating towards the abandoned wreck of her childhood home, a place that she has been warned never to go. Eventually she discovers that her dark imaginings are a couple shades lighter than what's going on in the real world and that her yearnings have clouded her view.

I START COUNTING does a beautiful job of capturing the confusion of being trapped in a limbo between a dissolving childhood and an alluring, yet threatening adult world. It's quite a character study as we are granted near full access to Wynne's haunting memories and current fantasies. It's a beautifully shot film utilizing an almost uniform palate of gray and beige hues and the soundtrack and locations bring to life an idiosyncratic bubble of history during radically shifting social mores. (Wait until you get a load of the record store Wynne's other brother Jim (MICHAEL FEAST) works at!) Best of all, I START COUNTING delivers a pretty steady pulse of suspense and even a few punches of horror. Its focus on the psychological, strong use of symbolism and willingness to jump freely between what's going on in reality and what's going on in Wynne's head insures that the viewer always has something to chew on.. You may figure things out before Wynne does but that just makes things all the more nerve racking. I don't want to ruin too much, so I'll say no more. Now get watching!

Streaming Alert! :: The Hazing (2004)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

There is a reason so many people remember eighties horror movies so fondly and it's because many of them were actually, you know, fun. Fun is important and fun is impossible to fake. If you really enjoy and believe in what you're doing, fellow humans can often detect it. It's like a sixth sense or something. If you create something solely to make money, bask in your own ego or grind a boring axe, people can smell that too and it smells really bad, like as bad as that sponge in my sink is beginning to smell. To prove my theory, just watch both A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and its remake back to back. Notice how the first one smells like fine leather and the other one smells like being smacked upside the head in a urine soaked alley with a sweat stained tube sock stuffed with spoiled clam dip? That's what I'm talking about!

2004's THE HAZING directed by ROLFE KANEFSY is officially NOT the best movie I have ever seen in my entire life (how could it be, it doesn't even have DIANE FRANKLIN in it?) but I can assure you that it IS fun and you won't have to whip out the glade brand room deodorizer afterward either. The budget was obviously on the light side and some of the special effects are sub-MR. BOOGEDY, but it has heart and what I detect as a genuine desire to show its audience a good time. It actually began life as a potential sequel to 1981's HELL NIGHT which it still vaguely resembles, but it ends up being more of a cross between THE BREAKFAST CLUB and NIGHT OF THE DEMONS (the original, non-depressing one.) You may notice nods to TOURIST TRAP and THE EVIL DEAD too and happily these nods come across as affectionate hat tips rather than cinephile regurgitation.

You can't have a likable film without a likable cast and fittingly you'll find one here. NECTAR ROSE as a bimbo hiding her inner Buffy comes across as this generation's answer to NANCY ALLEN, TIFFANY SHEPIS shows some real range for someone constantly clad in a skin-tight astronaut outfit and when is anyone NOT glad to see genre legend BRAD DOURIF? You get decapitations, you get laughs and you even get to know some of the characters before they die. I forget and refuse to Google how many more days it is to HALLOWEEN but the best part of THE HAZING is that it makes it seem so much closer. Check this one out on Netflix Streaming while you can and you just might find yourself positioning it on your permanent October playlist in the future.