kindertrauma

Category: Streaming Alert!

Sunday Viewing: Monsters Season 1, episode 13: Glim Glim

Posted on By unkle lancifer

You guys have to meet Glim Glim if you have not already had the honor. He lives in a Christmas set episode of MONSTERS from 1989. He looks a little like McDonald's "Grimace" crossed with a pickle with Sigmund the Sea Monster tentacles. Poor guy, his space ship crashed on the planet and he accidently killed a bunch of people because of some virus he brought with him but he's trying this best to correct the situation. Sadly his high-pitched voice makes communication impossible (although viewers are privy to his thoughts) and his appearance (not to mention his track record of inadvertently killing people) is a major hurdle in making new friends.

Christmas is right around the corner though and what better time to express one's good intentions and offer an olive branch? GLIM GLIM is awesome. The world needs more GLIM GLIM and it needs it now. GLIM GLIM was written by PAUL F. WILSON (THE KEEP) and is the lone directorial effort of PETER STEIN the cinematographer of both FRIDAY THE 13th PART 2 and PET SEMATARY. It also stars a young JENNA VON OY who a few years later would star in BLOSSOM and not BATTLESTAR GALACTICA as a character named "Six". This is a very special episode, as they say, so if you don't have tissues remember toilet paper works just as well.

Sunday Viewing:: Ghost Story's House of Evil and Doorway to Death

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Ever since our pal Crabbymoon identified a recent NTT as an episode of GHOST STORY aka CIRCLE OF FEAR, I've been on a binge-mission. I had started the series on YouTube years ago but it disappeared as soon as the universe discovered I was enjoying it. Thank Goodness Crabbymoon rekindled my interest because a recent Google dig unearthed the series in its entirety, looking far sharper than it had before. (You can view the entire series HERE and I'd suggest doing it pronto because something tells me this ship is sailing soon.) Not every episode is a goldmine but there are more than a few standouts and even the lesser offerings are laced with super potent LSD (Lurid Seventies Décor). I haven't watched them all yet but allow me to spotlight two segments, both directed by DARYL DUKE (THE SILENT PARTNER).

HOUSE OF EVIL is a must see. Written by ROBERT BLOCK, it stars a young JODIE FOSTER as Judy, a deaf-mute girl who discovers she can communicate telepathically with her grandfather who happens to be played by MELVYN DOUGLAS. It's a sweet set up until you learn that grandpa dabbles in black magic and his inheritance is hate. DOUGLAS and FOSTER are not surprisingly both phenomenal. There's a scene involving grudge-gramp instructing unsuspecting Judy on how to make voodoo dolls out of raisin cookies, tooth-picks and swatches of stolen clothing and there's something truly mesmerizing about its patience and the weaving of Douglas' voiceover with dreamily random piano cords. It doesn't hurt that this supernatural tale takes place in a slightly remodeled version of the BEWITCHED house.

DOORWAY TO DEATH is a later episode written by HAMMER regular JIMMY SANGSTER during the shows retitled CIRCLE OF FEAR second season. This is the first episode I ever saw and it remains hard to beat in my book. SUSAN DEY, LEIF GARRETT and DAWN LYN (Dodie!) are siblings who have just moved into an apartment building in San Francisco. This is a rather unusual ghost story as the younger kids explore the third floor they encounter a room that leads to another dimension where a seemingly nice man spends an inordinate amount of time chopping wood in the snow. It turns out his axe has chopped more than just logs and the silent apparition has his eye on DEY as a replacement for the wife he killed. As with HOUSE OF EVIL, director Duke brings a lyrical dreamy quality to the story while never letting up on the suspense. So far these two kindertraumatic episodes are my favorites but I'm keeping my mind open as other installments include the likes of JANET LEIGH, KIM DARBY and PATTY DUKE. Back to YouTube for me.

Sunday Viewing:: The Brady Bunch's Fright Night

Posted on By unkle lancifer

#Bradygate. The boys trick the girls into thinking a threatening force haunts the yard. The girls convince the boys that a rebellious spirit is breaking free from a trunk. Harmony can only be restored once toiler Alice has obliterated an effigy of her oppressor's head. Don't lament the destruction of Carol's lone artistic achievement, having won third prize rather than first it is valued as less than garbage. This is the way we all became the Brady Bunch.

Sunday Viewing:: Galactica 1980's The Night the Cylons Landed

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I think we can all agree that if Cylons landed on Earth on Halloween night it would be particularly devastating, as folks would naturally assume that they were costumed revelers rather than robots committed to the final annihilation of the life form known as man. If this concept chills you to the bone fear not, the entertaining yet borderline atrocious two part episode of GALACTICA 1980 entitled "The Night the Cylons Landed" is here to assure you that there's nothing a clown, a microwave oven, a few verses of "The Goodship Lollipop" and Wolfman Jack can't fix. As the Cylons take Manhattan, keep your eyes peeled for PETER MARK RICHMAN as crabby Colonel Briggs who'd go on to portray crabby chaperone Charles McCulloch in FRIDAY THE 13th PART 8.

YouTube Alert:: The Trouble with Miss Switch (1980)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Halloween is coming up swiftly so stop messing around and get in the mood by diving into the best ABC WEEKEND SPECIAL ever known, THE TROUBLE WITH MISS SWITCH (1980). Featuring some of the greatest voice talents of all time (JANET WALDO, JUNE FORAY, NANCY McKEON), and showcasing the most impressive animation this side of THUNDARR THE BARBARIAN, discriminating viewers should have no trouble being enthralled out of their gourds by THE TROUBLE WITH MISS SWITCH.

Come for the talking cat, stay for the terrifying "comput-o-witch"! When it's over, you're sure to feel your life is over too but fear not, the characters you have fallen in love with return in the outstanding equal-sequal, MISS SWITCH TO THE RESCUE (1982).

Viewing Party:: Night Vision (1987)

Posted on By unkle lancifer

We have something real cool today and it's all thanks to our pal Darkko who shared this flick with me. It's called NIGHT VISION and it's from 1987 and it's directed by the apparently late and clearly great MICHAEL KRUEGER. Now, if you're NOT the type who digs zero budget flicks that lean toward the long winded and feature only short spurts of sanity, you may want to run in the other direction, feel free, nobody blames you. But if you, like me, go gaga for the blessed confetti explosion of idiosyncrasy such outsider efforts frequently supply, you may have just entered heaven and not just any heaven, hog heaven, the best heaven of all! To bait his hook, Dan H. cleverly advised me to simply watch a short scene on YouTube knowing full well it would seal the deal…

Did you see that? This movie largely takes place in a corner Mom and Pop video store sometime in the eighties! I feel like I'm seeing something that was filmed in some beloved home I once lived in and in a way I am. I don't have to tell you that this little gem has many flaws but so do we all and flaws really aren't so bad if you simply embrace them. Scraggily though it may be, NIGHT VISION is rather imaginative all things considered and was ambitious enough to go against the grain during a time when many horror flicks were marching in line. Also this film is basically about a haunted videotape which makes it quite the early precursor. Or maybe this KRUEGER guy just liked VIDEODROME a lot, I don't know. If nothing else it fearlessly exposes the seedy underbelly of Denver.

So here's the thing, I have to go away for a little while because I gotta do something that I said I was going to do that I never did. You know how it is. I need to focus because I can only do one thing at time and multitasking is for chumps. So I'm leaving you with this movie to view and here is my challenge to anyone who wants to participate…

Watch this movie and identify as many VHS movie boxes that appear on the shelves at the video store that you can.

I'll even start you out!

  • I spied the large clamshell box for THE TOWN THAT DREADED SUNDOWN. Yay for me.
  • They have the same plastic embossed FROM BEYOND ad I used to have hanging on my bedroom wall. Weep.
  • Do they really have a poster for the YVONNE DeCARLO flick VULTURES (1987) posted by the door? That has to be rarer than a hen's tooth!
  • Why is there a VHS copy of the GOLDIE HAWN and BURT REYNOLDS vehicle BEST FRIENDS in the SCI-FI section? I feel like that is a subliminal message.
  • Good lord, is that the same VHS copy of BLOORAGE (1979) that Craftypants Carol sent to me but with its title altered to BLOOD NYMPHS?!?!

    • All right, I gotta get started on the thing I said I'd do that I never did. I'll check back in the comments section when I can. Have fun, play safe!

    1987–NIGHT VISION-HORROR FILM from Jonathan Moser on Vimeo.

    Sunday Viewing:: Thriller's Parasite Mansion (1961)

    Posted on By unkle lancifer

    I can't believe I've never seen a single episode of the BORIS KARLOFF-hosted anthology series THRILLER before. I have several excuses as to why not but they make me sound stupid, so I'd rather not share them. Thankfully the fates stepped in and forced the issue. I was watching something on YouTube the other day when an episode of THRILLER popped up as a suggested next watch on the side. All I saw was a title card which read "Parasite Mansion" and I was sold. I can't resist a title like that, it sounds like the name of my new favorite band. Well, I must have watched the best episode first because I find it hard to believe there's another one better than "Parasite Mansion." It's all downhill from here. It's like a swampy pitstop between THE OLD DARK HOUSE (1932) and THE HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES (1932) and it features SPIDER BABY's (1967) BEVERLY WASHBURN as a tortured waif plagued by a poltergeist who is holed up in a decrepit room clinging to a rag doll and scribbling gibberish on the walls. The word "jackpot" comes to mind.

    Like all great stories, this one begins with car trouble, the kind of trouble that occurs when someone blows out your tires with a shotgun while you're driving through the woods on a dark, rainy night. PIPA SCOTT plays Marcia, a thoughtful woman with (Ginny Field-style) psychology on her side who wakes up in a cob web strewn, Southern gothic mansion and is kept against her will by a family of lunatics all bent on keeping a supernatural secret. I won't say anymore because I don't want to ruin anything but I must add that JEANETTE NOLAN as bonkers ringleader Granny Harrod is through the roof, over the moon, one for the books, phenomenal. I found her so mesmerizingly hideous that my pupils turned to hearts. I love a good hag and Granny Harrod is like the haggiest hag who ever hagged. It's so sad she can't be in every episode of THRILLER.

    Sunday Viewing:: The Babysitter (1980)

    Posted on By unkle lancifer

    Is there any possible chance that there are people alive on this planet who have never seen THE BABYSITTER (1980)? I would rather that not be the case. THE BABYSITTER has everything! It has WILLIAM SHATNER, PATTY DUKE, STEPHANIE ZIMBALIST, JOHN (fresh off THE FOG) HOUSEMAN and QUINN CUMMINGS! The only thing it doesn't have is an actual babysitter on account of the lunatic in this is really more of live-in nanny but who cares about that? Can you believe this slice of excellence was directed by PETER (ROMEO IS BLEEDING) MEDAK the very same year he directed the super-classic THE CHANGELING? It's true because that is what my nice computer just told me. Read our dusty old review back HERE and save your day from becoming meaningless by watching the spectacular full movie below….