It's a Horror to Know You:: Eric Eddy!

It's a Horror to Know You: Eric Eddy of TEH INTERNETS!

A special introduction: I'm sorry. My list is way too long, but I've included a crapload of links and I believe that everything on here deserves a mention.

What is the first film that ever scared you?

Since I've been watching horror films since I was a toddler, that's a difficult one to answer. I literally can't remember the first film that scared me, as my brain was not completely developed into the super-genius that I am today. I will say that the first film that truly creeped me out (that I can remember) was CANDYMAN. Tony Todd is the fucking boss and you'd better respect him. He is the consummate professional in every project he's involved in (whether it be HATCHET or STAR TREK). The trippy dream sequences of Virginia Madsen (who may or may not have been hypnotized during those scenes!), Clive Barker's blessing and a GREAT SCORE only lend to the creepiness. It was also one of the first really cerebral horror films I had seen and got me thinking… a lot… about never going to the bathroom again.

What is the last film that scared you?

Another tough call. I've been known more to get choked up during movies before getting scared. I would say the the most recent film to have a really horrifying situation that made me cringe was TRAILOR PARK OF TERROR, for some reason. Seeing someone get jerkied (AND DEEP FRIED) by SERGEANT STANK, while his pervy, sweaty zombiness is explaining to his victim what he's doing, while he's doing it and why is pretty unsettling if it would happen to be any degree close to realistic.

Name three Horror movies that you believe are underrated.

1. The PHANTASM series. Yes. You heard me. The whole shebang. It's an awesome ride from beginning to end and anyone who is a fan of genre-bending, zombies, sci-fi, fantasy and/or supernatural horror is welcome to come aboard. DON COSCARELLI is a true master and I don't think any of his films get the justice they deserve. The cast of these movies play off of each other in a way that you would swear that they really are family. If you haven't seen these, do yourself a favor and see them as soon as possible.

2. NIGHTBREED just reeks of pure awesomeness from beginning to end. While it is considered horror, it is more of a violent fairy tale, speaking about the evils of prejudice and intolerance. It is one of the very few horror films (a la Basket Case 2 & 3) where the real villain is humanity and it's unwillingness to accept anything that is different. Also, DAVID CRONENBERG is balls to the wall fucknut crazy in it and puts forth an exceptional(ly creepy) performance.

3. JACK BROOKS: MONSTER SLAYER has to be my third pick. This movie has gotten a lot of hate and a lot of love, but it really deserves more love. Here is a movie that isn't afraid to throw us in a bass-ackwards time warp back to the 80s when horror movies were funny and had heart to boot. A great (and funny) leading man, a great (and funny) ROBERT ENGLUND and a whole heap of practical special effects that ooze charm make this film really stand out. I love it and you should too. God help you if I find out you don't love it.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

1. NIGHT OF THE CREEPS is so underrated, they didn't even get a DVD release until 2009. A lot of love and care went into the production of this film and the only reason it isn't on my main list is simply because I thought about it at the last minute. This is one of my favorite films and perhaps one of the GREATEST FILMS OF ALL TIME.

2. ANYTHING with PEOPLE MELTING.

3. A lot of STEPHEN KING MOVIES, especially the NIGHT FLIER.

4. TROLL is another one of those films that just kind of slipped under the radar. It is more of a "dark fantasy" film, rather than a horror film. Produced by CHARLES BAND, it has nice, gooey effects, some cool puppets and a stellar cast (not to mention Julia Louis-Dreyfus prancing around a forest wearing nothing but strategically placed LEAVES). On a side note, HARRY POTTER (the idea and character) was ripped off from this film (despite dispute from J.K. Rowling (a single mother in England who had never written anything before in her life), who said the idea "just came to her").

5. One of my favorite films from my childhood is THE GATE. This film has tons of heart and some truly great effects, including one of the best STOP MOTION MONSTERS to date in a film. I don't have to say anything else, you should watch this movie (and the remake being helmed by none other than Mr. BILL S. PRESTON, ESQ., ALEX WINTER).

6. GROUNDHOG DAY (just kidding).

Name three horror movies that you enjoy against your better judgment.

1. I have no idea why I like HELLRAISER: BLOODLINE so much. I guess I consider the flashback sequences pretty interesting. They show the creation of the puzzle box among other things. I do wish they would have stuck more closely with the Hellraiser comic books, as they were approved by Clive Barker and much more twisted.

2. ZOMBIE STRIPPERS is just plain, downright hilarious. Yet again, ROBERT ENGLUND brings his full-on comedy chops to this one. Even the porn stars are damn funny. The outbreak starts with a soldier named "BYRDFLOUGH." I am not even kidding. It boggles the mind.

3. JASON X strikes my funny-bone for some strange reason. Starring a cast mostly consisting of Canadians known best for their work on Sci-Fi shows and films, it's just an oddball in the Friday the 13th franchise. For one, it is CLEARLY not meant to be taken seriously. It has some pretty unoriginal KILLS and a lot of the humor is pretty FORCED, but I still enjoy the hell out of it. It actually has the highest kill count of any of the films because Jason takes out a fucking SPACE STATION. Maybe I just like how that huge monster KANE HODDER portrays Jason. He's just so damn good with that body language. Another interesting tidbit is that it is the first film to be shot completely digitally in HD. Oddly enough, its cast also includes DAVID CRONENBERG and TONY TODD. Also, sadly, there isn't enough footage on YouTube, save for the whole damn movie, to get you guys the links I wanted to.

Send us to five places on the Internet!

1. Perhaps the most important link, NIGHT OF THE CREEPS is a now defunct horror review site where only the worst of the worst are reviewed. It's lewd, crude, rude and features hilariously un-PC reviews. We need to get this site back, perhaps even revive it with a new cast.

2. DESTRUCTOCON: A plug for my buddy's web comic.

3. FREEKLAND: Alex Winter's greatest project to date. This movie is so stupid it's funny and so stupid it's stupid.

4. BRAWL IN THE FAMILY : A web comic for the kid in all of us. It centers around the cast of Super Smash Bros. Brawl. Definitely for gamers and Nintendo fans out there, but no one else, really.

5. BADMOVIES.ORG : One of the best review sites around. I have learned about more stinkers (and awesome B-movies) from this site than anywhere else.

It was REALLY hard for me to come up with this list. A lot of thought went into it because of the sheer amount of horror movies out there. Thanks for letting me share, Kinderpals!