kindertrauma

Name That Trauma :: FilmFather on a Frankenstein Monster HBO Special

Posted on By aunt john

Hey guys — I've got a Name That Trauma just in time for Halloween…

I remember watching an HBO variety special, featuring a live audience, in the late '70s or early '80s. Only two acts still stick in my head: One was a ventriloquist whose dummy was a plant name Phil O'Dendron. (Sample dialogue between man and dummy: "O'Dendron. Is that Irish?" Dummy: "Well, I'm wearing green!")

The other act was this elaborate set of a scientist's lab, a la Dr. Frankenstein. A scientist in a white lab coat, mop-top hair, and sunglasses (?) brings a Frankenstein-like monster to life from the operating table. The monster's dressed in all black, green skin, but a normal-shaped head (no square noggin). Via remote control, the scientist makes the monster do all kinds of body movements, including a forward lean a la MICHAEL JACKSON in the "Smooth Criminal" video. Audience applauds.

Satisfied with what he's done, the scientist puts down the remote and turns his back to work on something else. Suddenly, the monster becomes self-aware, shoots a look at the scientist and starts walking towards him. He stops directly behind the scientist, the scientist turns around, and the monster grabs both sides of the scientist's head and twists it off his body.

The audience gasps as the doctor's headless body falls to the ground. The monster then raises the head to his face, turns to the camera and, in a close-up, smirks. Turns out the monster was the performer and the scientist was the "monster."

Pretty cool, yes, but as a kid I was not ready for that whole head-tearing-off thing.

Anybody else remember this show, or if there's a clip online somewhere?

AUNT JOHN SEZ: FilmFather, this sounds so familiar but all of my searches are coming up empty handed.

Traumafessions :: Reader Annie M. on BBC's Animated Macbeth

Posted on By aunt john

Hey so I know everyone says this, but you guys have an awesome site. Because of its awesomeness, I was compelled to share my own traumafession.

When I was a kid, my parents bought me this series of BBC animated Shakespeare movies. They probably thought that since they were animated, they were for children, right? So, so wrong. The Romeo and Juliet episode contained cartoon nudity and the Midsummer Night's one was even more sexual than that. But the one that sticks out to me the most would have to be the version of Macbeth.

This movie terrified me. I remember watching in rapt horror as the witches at the beginning changed their faces from old crones to horrible skeletons. The whole thing is pretty violent and dark but the worst scene for me was probably the scene where Macbeth kills Duncan.

That, or the scene where Lady Macbeth is doing her whole "unsex me" soliloquy. She is getting more and more frantic and then suddenly RIPS OPEN HER CHEST and some horrible beasts burst out! The animation is really beautiful and I'm sure this scene is supposed to represent all the hatred and lust for power inside her, but I was 6 and did not pick up on that just yet. Anyway, all of the episodes are pretty well done and they're fun to watch now but I still cringe when I see those scenes.

Pretty cool, yes, but as a kid I was not ready for that whole head-tearing-off thing.

Anybody else remember this show, or if there's a clip online somewhere?

Name That Trauma :: Reader Radio1 on a Deboned Lighthouse Keeper & Zombie Lincoln!

Posted on By aunt john

Hi Guys,

When I was a kid in the ‘70s, many things scared me. Two of them I cannot identify– though I remember snippets of them.

#1: A film made in ‘60s/early 7'0s. Seen on T.V. in late ‘70s. It opened with some kind of tracking station tracking something. A craft/meteorite or whatever crash lands. Cut to a foggy cove with a lighthouse, the lighthouse attendant finds said something and gets attacked by a monster. He screams and later people find his corpse– but there are no bones in it!

I think it starred one of the big three: VINCENT PRICE, CHRISTOPHER LEE or PETER CUSHING. Could have been a HAMMER film or an AIP film, maybe…

#2: A film made in mid/late ‘70s on NBC Sunday Night Movie. I remember the announcer's voice well. There's some kind of wake or viewing of body in a closed casket (i.e. lying in state). The scene seemed to be in the mid-1800s America. All I can remember is the expensively draped casket (head of state funeral), and suddenly it opens and someone says, "President Lincoln's alive!" That scared the bejesus out of me! Who knows if I watched a few more seconds, maybe I would have found out it was some kind of T.V. Movie revival of THE WILD WILD WEST. But it sure seemed to me like Zombie-Lincoln…!

Can you help?

UPDATE: Senski nailed the first one with ISLAND OF TERROR. We are still looking for an answer to the Zombie Lincoln trauma.

Offspring

Posted on By unkle lancifer

I love JACK KETCHUM, he scares the hell out me and once opened, you'd need a crowbar to pry one of his books out of my hands. OFFSPRING, scripted by KETCHUM himself, is based upon the literary sequel to his inaugural terrorizer OFF SEASON. If you're wondering why we're being presented with an adaptation of a sequel before its predecessor, as with many movie head scratchers, it involves a behind the scenes legal issue of some sort. No matter, OFFSPRING works just as well as a standalone story. In fact, the skeletal plot shadows the original tale closely. Basically you have a group of civilized folks battling off a tribe of attacking feral cannibals. An ex-cop is brought in to aid the police and a bloody climax takes place in the cave dwelling of the snarly savages.

On the page KETCHUM can convince you of anything, but OFFSPRING, as a film, has a much steeper hill to climb. Even though I have to admit to being vaguely freaked during some scenes (particularly during the first major attack on the film's happy family) there's a great deal here that fails to persuade. I like to think of myself as pretty adept at forgiving a film its budgetary restrictions, but the cave here looks borrowed from SIGMUND AND THE SEA MONSTERS and unfortunately (thanks to Aunt John's tutelage) I now know a bad wig when I see one. Trust me, the wild marauders depicted are truly disturbing in their actions but, much like in the case of the now dated original THE HILLS HAVE EYES, it's difficult to always take the grunting, blackened-toothed actors in loin clothes seriously.

Lovers of raw, depraved cinema may find scraps to gnaw on here and I appreciate the sparse approach, especially in terms of the films soundtrack. Still, the lack of credibility remains a major roadblock. The reality is, bringing KETCHUM's vicious vision unadulterated to the screen is probably not only impossible but also illegal. Where say, THE GIRL NEXT DOOR made up for its cinematic limitations by concentrating on tone and performances, OFFSPRING, by nature, hasn't quite the same option. Director ANDREW VAN DEN HOUTEN (HEADSPACE) can't really be faulted for going straight for the jugular but without a believably solid rack to hang his entrails on, it's an empty gesture. OFFSPRING has disturbing moments for sure (how else can you describe an infant thrown like a football?), but mostly it just feels routinely (and too often, humorously)…off.

Name That Trauma :: Reader Kerstin on Rock-A-Bye Dead Baby

Posted on By aunt john

Hi!

That's a really cool site you have, brings back memories!

I almost gave up on identifying this one, but maybe you can name that trauma:

I'm looking for a movie I saw about 13 years ago, when I spent a lot of time watching horror films in a friend's basement.

It's probably pretty old. I'm quite sure that it was black and white, but maybe it's just very dark.

The story takes place in a house in a forest (or by a forest). I have a blurry memory of a man arriving at the house and being welcomed by a family, but maybe I'm mixing things up here with another movie.

There was a grown up daughter who was treated like a little girl and I think they had at least two children.

In the end the girl is holding her dead baby in a rocking chair (or a cradle?). I'm not even sure there was a real baby. It might be that she just believed she had a baby and that she was swinging something else.

I know that's not much to go with, but that last scene was really memorable, so maybe someone can recall the name?

Thanks,

Kerstin


UPDATE: NAME THAT TRAUMA SOLVED! Special thanks to SlasherChick for answering it with AMERICAN GOTHIC.

Paranormal Activity

Posted on By unkle lancifer

Really? That's it? That's PARANORMAL ACTIVITY? I'm not a hard guy to scare. I've gotten the creeps watching A HAUNTING on A&E in the middle of the day. I jump when the phone rings, my doorbell jolts me like electroshock therapy, I have bad dreams about kittens and I can't stomach the nightly news. THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT actually did freak me out. PARANORMAL ACTIVITY? Nothing …nada. I'm not trying to be contrary. I didn't go in the theater with a chip on my shoulder; I tried very hard to get into this movie. I left my expectations at the door and I imagined it was all happening to me (something that usually works) and still I felt zero fear. What the heck is supposed to be scary in this movie? A blanket falling off the bed? C'mon…really?

Maybe it's me. Maybe because sleepwalking, hours of lost time, unexplained bite marks and crouching in fear from unseen malevolent forces are such huge parts of my day to day existence that they just don't freak me out as much as they should on film. I wanted to be scared, I did. I hate people who say they don't get scared! Still, I don't get this movie! How is it that this movie struck a nerve with some people? To me it's just a story about some garden-variety schlub who's scared of the baggage (i.e. emotional needs) that comes with the gal he just shacked up with. Yea, a Ouji board catches on fire, but the scariest thing in this movie to me was the book on demons that he leafs through. I get subtle horror people, I do; I swear. I don't need slimy monsters and decapitations. Ugh, maybe I just hated the way the couple depicted decorated thier home. Was she having a crafty beading party at one point? I hate this couple. I think they cut in front of me at the concession stand before the movie and asked for unsalted popcorn.

Oh well, to each his own. I don't feel ripped off or anything. I don't feel tricked by the brilliantly creative advertising campaign. I just feel like I got a lap dance from someone that everybody but me is turned on by (wouldn't be the first time). If you find this movie scary, all I can say is I am sooooo jealous of you. I want to be you right now. I want to sleep with the lights on tonight. I want to double bolt my door and watch SABRINA THE TEENAGE WITCH until I'm relaxed and stable again. Maybe I should put on [REC] or WOLF CREEK to get to that place. I know, I'll watch THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT! If only I could get this damn SINEAD O'CONNOR TUNE out of my head…